my weekend started with the news that the
youngest
child of the
family that acted as my surrogate when things were tough for me died on wednesday. i got the news
friday, an half hour before the viewing so i changed clothes and sped over to the
funeral home. i passed by where he
crashed and died and that's when i started
crying. it was an open
casket which was very startling to me. there was christopher but he wasn't ever going to open his eyes again. i knelt in front of the casket and said a
prayer for him and his family. i couldn't keep my eyes shut while i was praying. i just couldn't stop looking at his hands holding the
rosary. it was his rosary, one i had always thought was cheesy because it's beads
glowed in the dark. i don't know why i noticed (or why i can't get the thought of it out of my head) but his fingernails were dirty with what looked like motor
oil.
i couldn't bring myself to go to the funeral on saturday
morning. the whole situation had made me very
upset. not only because christopher was
dead, but because i wasn't sure what to say to someone who was now an only child or someone who had lost their youngest child.
i left the viewing and went to my
boyfriends house. we went to a bar and i got myself good and
drunk. (as an interesting side note there was a guy there who said he was a computer programmer, so of course i said "me too! what language do you program in?" when he responded "french, german, swedish" i was pretty sure he was a
bullshit artist.)
when i woke up saturday i felt pretty
shitty from
hangover and
nightmares. i had
dreams about christopher's dirty fingernails. well, more specifically i had dreams of how his finernails got dirty. i had dreams of him
clawing his way out of an overturned
car through
dirt muddied by oil
leaking from the car.
i don't know how, but the
weekend went from being
terrible to being
wonderful. my hangover soon dissapeared and my
sister and
brother-in-law called saturday to invite me and craig to
dinner. it was their 5th wedding
aniversary, and we went to the
restaurant where their wedding
reception had been. after dinner i was still aching to do something to keep my mind off stuff and so we went to find a go-cart racing
track in the nearest
hick town (frederick,
maryland). i didn't
win, but it's because all the guys
race dirty (
tee hee). we headed back to my sisters house and all four of us played
monopoly (which i won, because i'm elite). it may sound a bit
dorky, but i really enjoy spending time with both my
family and my
boyfriend. it
pleases me that they get along so well.
on our way home from my sisters, craig and i stopped to pick up
ice cream,
milk, and
chocolate syrup to make
milkshakes. we decided to also grab
sandwiches, and big-game
lottery tickets in the hope of winning the 300 million prize. we went to bed full of thick chocolate milkshake and woke up at
noon.
on friday i had
e-mailed the boyfriend saying i wanted to try to find somewhere to go
swimming this weekend, but despite the fact that it's in the 90's, no swimming pools around here open before memorial day. so i just said lets go
outside and do something, even if it's just driving around. we took the top off my car and headed to craigs sisters house. it was
hot and
sunny and craig had bought a water rocket for his
nephews, and we played outside most of the time. i found two four-leaf clovers, but i got burnt
lobster red (it's a small price to pay).
we headed out once my
stomach started
growling and had calzones at a brick oven pizzeria nearby. then we headed back to
virginia so i could drop craig off. we
detoured to take the georgetown pike instead of the dulles toll road because it's far prettier, and i decided we should stop at great falls (an
amazing sight, by the way) and walk around for a bit since there was still a few hours of sunlight left. we hiked down
river along the
rocks and amazingly i only fell down once. not so amazingly it left
bruises all over my
knees and
shins. after an hour out there we headed back towards the car and back on the
road to craigs.
what a
gorgeous weekend it was. i love the sun and the hot
weather. i got a good bit of
exercize and spent time with the people i
love the most.
i am still quite bummed about christopher dying, however he now knows the
secret of what comes after life. i don't doubt that he will be around in
spirit for his whole family when they need him. i kindly ask that anyone with spiritual beliefs think kindly of this family. they're
hurting.
i know none of this really has anything to do with
today but i didn't get a chance to
node over the weekend (though my boyfriend indulged his hobby of
everything jacking). as today progressed there will come more.
FOOD:
2 cups
coffee with
cream
1 veggie
burger
a
salesman just walked into my
office and showed his lack of
comprehension for other than his tan pants and deck shoes by telling me why he didn't think he could sell the product i've had a large hand in developing. his primary
bitch was "why can't we make the
software know how to get through all
firewalls without the firewalls knowing?" uh. duh. stupid fuck. i just wonder why he thinks i'm going to be receptive to his unknowledgeable
insults. even if he made
valid points, i'm still not the person to go to for changes within the
product. i'm not trained to know what sells. i'm not paid to know what sells. i know enough about it to keep my mouth shut. i wish he did.