It's been a while since the last daynode
. Almost an unfathomable three days! I guess that's a great scale on how much I've been working and trying to get some rest! But, it wasn't uneventful, but nothing life changing I presume.
Again, I'm here, in the darkness. With Fin.K.L
concert tape playing in the VCR and HyoLee dancing, I sit here with my keyboard. I'm no longer surrounded by darkness but with pleasant images and pleasant sounds. Eye candy
usually helps ease the mind of a young man in the midst of loneliness, with the drawback of knowing that I'll never achieve a lasting relationship with one such as Yuri or Hyori. But I'll worry about that when the video turns off. Even then, I'll just rewind it then.
My infatuation with Fin.K.L
has driven my mind to almost remembering the words. The image of the lovely women singing the songs, combined with their very tranquil
voices have led me to begin remembering the sounds of the voices in conjunction with the songs. I have no idea what they are saying but at least I remember some of the words. I don't even listen to the music much anymore. But still, I still think about the beautiful smiling faces of Fin.K.L
Work is starting to get annoying, but thinking about it sensibly, retail isn't particularly the best job. Its easy, but not fun. Ikea
is a fun place to shope but not a nice place to stay in for about 8.5 hours standing around.
I was supposed to go clubbing tonight at the Purple Onion
with some old coworkers from McDonald's
. But I woke up this morning, only to wake up drowsy and lacking of energy. It feels as if a leech drained my life out of me. While I wanted to see them, I wanted to bail, not wanting to collapse while dancing. Besides, I have work tomorrow at 2 PM. But to be polite, I wanted to know the details anyways, then maybe just lie about not being able to go. But in the end, it worked out so that it's been delayed
until next week. Great!
I chill at home for a while, only to wallow in my own puddle of self defeat
. Wallowing, combined with ice cream is a great solution to anything. Finally, I call my lady friend to make sure she's okay. She wasn't feeling great the other day so I wanted to make sure she's okay. But when I called, she was with her boyfriend and an old mutual friend of ours. We met up later on, but her boyfriend picked me up because she went home first. We even went to go get milk. I go walk around Save On Foods
all the time but I don't really know this guy that well so it was sort of weird. At least he's a nice guy.
After grabbing a cone at McDonald's
and going to the arcade (two actually), I'm home again. It's now almost an hour since I started this nodelet and now its coming to an end. It's been a long day and I've been thinking too much. I need to get out of this funk. Even watching The Mummy Returns
didn't really help. I need to get more sleep. You know you're too tired even when you're to tired to think about how lonely you are. Whoops. I guess I"m not that tired yet.
You run to me, crying on my shoulders, telling me how cruel the world is to you. You grasp your arms around mine, and place your face on my shoulder. I feel your tears through my shirt, and I slowly place my arms around you. Gently, my thumb rubs the tear running down your face before it hits your mouth. You calm down enough to tell me how cruel everyone is and how the world is unfair. The whole time, I listen closely, and listen to each world. While you complain how cruel the world is to you, I start thinking how cruel the world is to me. How fair is the world when you're crying to me and I'm not the one you love? You don't understand. Walk in my shoes for that moment. Then you will understand a greater power in the world than cruelty: Irony.