Strip Clubs! Bathtubs of the choicest hops! Live not-very-nude JessicaPierce! And... Sunday Sunday Suuuunnnnday morning!
Names, dates and reality may have been changed to corrupt the innocent and confuse the rest.
After a week of little sleep
and many tests, there is rarely something as joyful to look forward to as an E2 party
. But low and behold, this week there was! After spending friday in preperation, sharpening my wit with many consecutive games of MegamanX
and a ninja-style
walk through the city
, Jethro arrived around 6:30 to enrich me with the spirit of malt
and provide a lift to said gathering. It was a long and hard quest
, but after exploring business park
s and conquering red lights en masse we managed to stumble upon accipiter
's secret lair. Inside were pukesick
were still out getting pizza and the Wonkoalition
was on the way, so we chilled for a while. Scouring around the apartment
I noticed two things: There were no brownies
and the crazytaxi disc
was missing. Just as I was about to lay light on this conspiracy, there was a knock on the door... Enter the Wonkoalition, namely (or pseudo-namely) WonkoDSane
, and Medieval
. More introductions and attempts at putting faces
until it's time for a smoke break (how is it that 70% of all noders smoke?) Talk revolves around school
and hum-drum E2
topics while vertical positioning is adjusted
and cigarettes are smoked.
Back inside, we mix and mingle like the social butterflies we are, trying our best to remember "real names" and re-meet the people we find so charming in text. Soon enough, the crowd is enhanced by two lovely young ladies (escorted by our host) who are, in turn, enhanced by the ownership of two large pizzas. More introductions and screenname -> real name -> face and back matching ensued while pizza was consumed.
Social mingling commenced and I got the chance to talk to aphexious... I had read some of her stuff in the past (and liked it,) but after meeting her it becomes a lot more tangible. It's a impossible to describe her any better than Wonko did, but.. she listens to drum'n'bass and jazz, is one hell of a writer, intelligent and lurking, deep eyes, enticing smile and loads of energy, really cool to hang out with... too bad that she lives in Nashville. In fact, the entire Wonkoalition are a bunch of rad motherfuckers, to put it bluntly. They're all in real life like they are online, which is somewhat of a rarity... and they're hosting the next get together, so I better kiss some ass.
After some unsupervised god-power abuse the group collectively decided (at Wonko's suggestion) to head out towards a bowling alley... I rode with Templeton and Byzantine; upon arrival we find out about a two hour wait. Damn. Hey, there's always karaoke, right?
Riiiight, and Karaoke there was. Soon enough though, JP and the majority of her crew left, leaving only Accipiter, WonkoDSane, CrispyCrisco, aphexious, Mitzi, ccunning, and me to publicly humiliate ourselves (all but CrispyCrisco, who is a broadway trained vocalist... Needless to say, she owned everyone in the place without having to even try.) The white kids heated up the funk with such features as Crazy (both Patsy Cline and Britney Spears, the latter by accipiter), King of the road, Don't fear the reaper, Summer nights and many many others. The audience wasn't the least bit amused... but we were. Fuck the unsuspecting public. Around 2 AM CrispyCrisco suggested that we should go to a "Titty Bar", and knowing how young women are about such things no one dared to stand in her way. Since we had seven people and one car, I was honored by being allowed to sit on Mitzi's lap. I can never sit in a regular seat again, for even the finest silk will seem like concrete in comparison with Mitzi's cloudlike lap... it was bliss - except for the speedbumps. =)
Accipiter gets his car; we head to the ATM and retrieve some money to support the poor and suppressed. Next on the list was the Wonkoalition's hotel room. While dropping off the beer we discuss the age issue and medieval lets me borrow his wallet (see through compartment for fake ID...) Templeton, JessicaPierce, Byz et. al. are asleep, leaving the extended Wonkoalition to be the only non-sissies in the area. Back into the soccer-mom rentalcar of screaming death and we proceed towards the Bar de titte, only to find out that it
- is closing in fourty minutes
- has a $6-$12 cover charge depending on age
Hastly it is decided that no publicly accessible breasts
can be this enticing and the mini-caravan turns around to return to the hotel. Beer is de-tubified and had
, some E2 talk comes up and the lounging commences.
Soon it is relatively late and the ladies go to bed... Discofever mentions walking home, I consider joining him in crashing at JPs, seeing as how all my crap was still over there. WonkoDSane offers us a ride, we gladly accept and after sucking down 3 stout ales like it was going out of style I'm ready to pass out wherever, which I figured would be proper thing to do. (I hadn't reserved a place to crash at JPs and I'm a worser person for it =b) WonkoD dropped us off and DiscoFever decided to be the coolest guy on earth by giving me his (actually byz' extra which was passed on) sleeping bag. I cover my mugly self and pass out.
Which is written in the past tense because feel like it. Alright? :p
Hell hath no fury
like the morning light. I came to most of my senses around nine AM at JessicaPierce
's where the majority of people were in the process of getting up.
Our Sunday host was still out cold
, but that was easily remedied... Jamcracker
was let into the bedroom, and a short scream later JP is out and about in her JP PJ
s. She and Byz
(I think) take showers and soon later the hungry horde
descends upon the nearest IHOP
. Our table was pretty clean
when we sat down, except for a few marks of syrup
under the dispenser... no biggie. Our waitress, Andrea
, took our orders and upon return
watered the table with orange juice. A few attempted assaults on our favorite dual-m-noder
later we all had our respective foods. After IHOP we stopped again at JP's - some took showers
, others nagged
jamcracker and everyone went through her stuff
... ...but, as all good things must come to an end we loaded up and said our goodbyes, once again parting for... the Econologe
The wonkoalition had just gotten up (in time for checkout) and were hastily stuffing everything that wasn't screwed on the walls into their bags. A generous tip jar was left for the maid and everyone once again descended to the car for pictures and goodbyes...
So we left, Templeton's crew went out of their way to drop me of in Atlanta and even put up with my "guess and go" directions (Byzantine's a patient, patient man...)
Thanks to evvveerrrryone for showing up and being such a bunch of cool mofos. Special thanks to accipiter for taking the initiative and hosting the part, special thanks also to Jessicapierce for co-hosting and sheltering us (and thanks for the tab! =) ) I'm hoping to see everyone and then some at the Wonkoalition's get-together whenever it may be, where the titty bars are open 'till noon and the steaks are large enough to ride home.
Things that "needed improvement":
But, all these things
considered, this 0wned. I now know five more people whose writeups
I'm eating up as they come out, have faces to put with everyone and
it was a rockin' weekend.
You know what to say, kids...
Thank you E2!