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Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "She never had sex with me when she was sober"

She dumped me when she found out I'd been faking my Scottish accent
When she was new, she rolled around the sky like a black umbrella blown by the wind
I was throwing around useless proverbs when all she needed was to be held and told that she was beautiful
She was never mine. I always shared her.
She was an intellectual prostitute, seducing me with profound truisms
someday, when she will think back upon the time when she was as yet undishonored
And when she came back she was nobody's wife
you never once told her how beautiful she was nor how much you truly loved her
I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
She only wants me for sex
When she was bad
She is stupidly keeping herself a secret, when I know she has sparkly things to show me
She was watching me and I didn’t know it.
I said I was sorry. Then she looked at me.
She was thinking of a boy in California who had a couch and a job
She had become a mutton for punishment and he was a wolf
She was the prettiest, loveliest cat at the ball and she had upon her fine gilded whiskers.
Is it fair for him to love me when she craves his touch?
She bought a new smile every week when we first started seeing each other. Then I had to buy them.
She had never kissed someone so old.
She hit me like thunder, and I had to lie down until I could breathe again
She was feminine in the most displaced sense I had ever seen, a known quality refracted through stained glass windows.
When that cow would walk it was like she was dancing
Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
She pulled the "I love you" on me
She found me on public transportation
Venus, when she is the evening star
The portion of her face she allows me to see
She taught me some moves, including stealthy exits.
She doesn't need me anymore
She only wants me for tech support
if you fear spells, look away when she decides to share her hair with the wind.
She handed me my first sharpened pencil.
I would have attempted to draw her if she had stayed that way.
She asked me to read her a poem
She tells me she drives a truck.
He touched her once and she turned into a golden creature. He never touched her again.
She was very beautiful. Y'know?
Her grief is still too young to behave itself, so she never lets it out
She saved me from Hylas' fate
The stars were bright that night she left me forever
She who makes the Moon the Moon and, whenever she is full, sets the dogs to howling all night long, and me with them.
I put my head down and hoped to God she wasn't looking at me
it was just as if she held her breath for 82 years
She was so quiet that nobody heard her
when she saw the funny side, we introduced my child bride to whisky and gin
She kills me
the cutest baker in the room was making sadfaces at me when i walked out
She cleaned up for me at least.
she looked at me then whispered, we are all made of stardust
She asked me to stop dreaming of death
She had incongruity for breakfast because she felt like it
She told me she wouldn't
Because I still love her, because I know she still loves me.
"He was a terrible man," she sobbed, between bites of alimony
I never told you she stole my heart
She could hit four octaves above high-C, but she never performed in public
I don't like her because she won't like me
For a lawyer she was surprisingly like a child. Sometimes.
She was buttery. She was asking for it. She was delicious. Let's all give in.
She said she loved me
I was wrong as a child, to think old people were stupid for asking me where the day had gone. Now I understand... we older people do not live.
Her innocence fell. She kicked at it some, frowned, and left it there because it was beautiful.
She was so pleased to learn that she was right
She was inside the music, with her eyes closed
She loves me, she loves me not
She always was all tea and oranges that came all the way from China
She was cilantro, jalapeño, habanero. She was the hot plate you must not touch.
She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
Existentialism is that girlfriend who cheated on you. Postmodernism is who she was with.
There is nothing growing here, in the space between she and me
He comforted me when he thought I needed it, but never when I really did
I was not made for love songs, and love songs will never be made for me.
she, he, and me
Two condoms, she makes me wear
She might not need me. But then again she might.
man when you are telling me how it was
My Mother She Killed Me, My Father He Ate Me
All the things she had at one point wanted to be
She loved me for my brains not my body. It's what zombies do.
A girl I know had her jaw wired shut, and she vomited.
So she could feel as if she had danced
bringing me back to when less was worth more
i gave her my heart. she gave me a pen.
She disappeared as if he had only dreamed her
She is still undoing me.
She misses me
Sex and death have both spat me out like spoiled milk for the same reason. I was not afraid.
this hunger in me, it never ends. I feed it every night when I dream
She was locked in time
I remember when it was me who made her toilet flush
She writes notes to me, to keep me in check
When someone was willing to drown with me, I really didn't want to drown anymore
To a girl who thought she was moving away
She Loves Me
She told me I'd make a good Satan
She told me to say that
He made me promise I would do this when I was next sad. So I promised myself I would not be sad again.
That one makes me scream, she said
She asked me to copy my poem into her notebook
My mother loves me. She uses the good sandwich bags.
She looks at me and she laughs
She told me I looked like a Henry, and this is how she would know me
She wakes me up by tickling my feet
I would have tried, but Charlotte kept Charlotte in the world of Charlotte and she barely heard me
The House on the Island Where She Was Born
When I was little my mother told me not to sit close to the T.V., so when I was six I did.
She was the seed of a strange tomorrow
She always was devious in her beauty
She is what happens when silence makes love with night.
The emotion on her face was always the one that she was feeling in her heart
His face when she fell
Her self image was not the force field she imagined it to be
She probably thought your first language was English; your real first language was Joyce
I remember when it was me who made you want to take over the world and enslave humanity
A dose of mystery slipped into her cocktail while she was in the ladies' room
She was most amazed by the obvious, like January and the fact that I could not possibly keep her.
You should have killed me when you had the chance
she spent the night gingerly peeling me off the moon.
She was pain and pleasure all at once, wrapped up in needles and Ramones T-shirts
I told her I could read her mind, but she didn't believe me. I could tell.
piano outside in the snow. and she was spinning
She left me on the boardwalk with my head held in my hands.
I had never known someone whose death was imminent
When she sleeps, is she not moving her legs aside for an unknown garrison?
I was tired. It was late. She was Russian.
And when she turned into a man, we were so proud
Tell him, she told me
She had the most wonderful grin in the world
she seems bored with me after all this time
She's smarter than me but she's also more quiet, therefore she has no personality which makes me feel better
She had a 10 million candlepower smile
She Blinded Me With Science
she had already found her party
that's where she lost me as I began imagining my family amongst blood-dripped hedges
I got the feeling the Fairy Council was mad at me when the president knocked over her coffee to get a better grip on my neck
She asked me if I loved her and I showed her the tattoo
This is the first time she's texted me since the morning she left.
She is lobbing rainbows at me from across the room and I am swallowing them like fear.
The rock under my foot that told me I was real when I was an adult
She Had to Be Sure
texting, she tells me anarchy will remain an important ideology
she had mood ring eyes
She said she loved me. The knife came down.
You knew I was a rattlesnake when you picked me up
I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
She approached me with some vague line
He had a prison of brass built in the hole, and then, when it was finished, he locked up his daughter
She told me she remembers three things about me
She hopes I'm cursed forever to sleep on a twin size mattress, never graduating up in size to add a lover.
She started to fall, and knew she would never come back
I remember when it was me who made her skin flush
She sang of fantastic green islands, and sparkling fish, never telling that she haunted the waters
She took a California tilt and never came back.
She had eyes like the Blue Screen of Death
She kissed me gently, just once, then walked away crying
Her perception of how gorgeous she is will be evident in her lack of movement during sex
Empty at last she had room to unfurl
Fast-talking career gal who thought she was one of the boys
So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
When she woke up, her hands were still dreaming
The walls she had built around herself cracked and crumbled
She stopped me in the city. A lost soul gambling on random encounters.
She was steady
She will remember your heart when men are fairy tales in books written by rabbits
When I was young Time had no wings
What the hell was she thinking?
She just looks at me
She dreamt she was a bulldozer, she dreamt she was alone in an empty field
She was a committed romantic and an anarcha-feminist. This was hard for her because it meant she couldn't blow up beautiful buildings.
She moved so easily all I could think of was sunlight
She Gave Sweet Love To Me
She had fingernails that shined like justice
The flowers smiled, but she was gone
The Abridged Edition: She was to one side, he was to the other, an untested bridge between them
He stretched out his arms but she was not there
He dreamt he was a bulldozer, she dreamt she was alone in an empty bed
She was a Surrealist Woman, She was like a Figure in a Dream
She grew a little older, while he was telling her
She loved me for my maths
All the while he was talking she was thinking what his whiskers would feel like on the back of her neck
She Fucks Me
I would have liked thunder when she left
Milk left on the counter overnight turned sour. She had turned as well.

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