The human body expels gas on average 14 - 23 times per day totalling about 2 pints in volume, most commonly as a burp. The air which isn't expelled by belching travels from the stomach to the intestines. Some of the gas is absorbed and some more is created by the further digestion of food. What remains is expelled through the anus. Gas is generally made up of carbon dioxide, oxygen, nitrogen, and sometimes methane. Only about 1/3 of people produce methane -- to figure out if you're part of the 33% nation, look at your poopies. in general, do they float? congratulations, you make methane! This doesn't mean your farts smell any more than the other 66% of the world -- methane is odorless. The smell is caused by bacteria.

garply = G = Gates's Law


[as in `gas chamber'] 1. interj. A term of disgust and hatred, implying that gas should be dispensed in generous quantities, thereby exterminating the source of irritation. "Some loser just reloaded the system for no reason! Gas!" 2. interj. A suggestion that someone or something ought to be flushed out of mercy. "The system's getting wedged every few minutes. Gas!" 3. vt. To flush (sense 1). "You should gas that old crufty software." 4. [IBM] n. Dead space in nonsequentially organized files that was occupied by data that has since been deleted; the compression operation that removes it is called `degassing' (by analogy, perhaps, with the use of the same term in vacuum technology). 5. [IBM] n. Empty space on a disk that has been clandestinely allocated against future need.

--The Jargon File version 4.3.1, ed. ESR, autonoded by rescdsk.

”The word "gas" was invented by Jan Baptist van Helmont as a phonetic spelling of the Dutch pronunciation of the Greek word "chaos".” (Wikipedia)

Gas reeks, smells, or often creates noise, and passing wind in a astronaut spacesuit damages them... Because everyone produces between 1-3 pints of gas a day and on average passes it fourteen times a day, it creates the question of what creates gas. What causes the smell? “The unpleasant odor of flatulence comes from bacteria in the large intestine that release small amounts of gases that contain sulfur.” (Mamas Health) The most rancid farts I’ve ever had are after eating eggs, which leads me to believe eggs have sulfur in them. “Gas that has a strong odor usually results from the metabolism of sulfur-containing proteins and amino acids in the intestines.” (Alt Medicine) Only 1 out of 3 people produce methane, if your stools float it is likely you are one of the 33%.

    Two main causes of gas:
  • Swallowed air
  • The normal breakdown of certain undigested foods by harmless bacteria naturally present in the large intestine (colon)

The process of swallowing air is called aerophagia. It would make sense then if you reduce the amount of air you swallowed, you’d reduce the amount of gas you pass. “Everyone swallows small amounts of air when eating and drinking. However, eating or drinking rapidly, chewing gum, smoking, or wearing loose dentures can cause some people to take in more air.” (Mamas Health) So to reduce gas from aerophagia you need to take your time while eating and drinking, you need to reconsider chewing gum altogether or reduce your chewing habits, you need to stop smoking or don’t start it, and you need to tighten up those dentures if you wear them.

Some foods are not digested in the human body, not just fiber, because the body lacks certain enzymes to break them down. This suggests that foods that produce gas in one person may not cause gas in another. “Hydrogen and carbon dioxide are produced by colon bacteria in the presence of poorly absorbed carbohydrates. If flatulence is accompanied by diarrhea and weight loss, it may indicate a malabsorption disorder such as lactose intolerance or pancreatic insufficiency, and should be evaluated by your primary health care provider.” (Alt Medicine) On a personal scale I’m 19, I weigh 145 pounds, and am 6’ 2”. I’m lactose intolerant, have terrible gas and haven’t gained a pound in five years, which supports this claim. Fats and proteins are relatively low on the scale of gas creation, whereas most carbohydrates are on the high end of the scale. Four sugars cause gas: raffinose (beans), lactose (milk products), fructose (onions, wheat, sweeteners), and sorbitol (fruits and gum). People who are lactose intolerant probably have the worst gas, because they have a shortage of the enzyme lactase. None-prescription drugs/pills can help in the assistance of digesting such foods that contain these sugars. They will support you with the enzyme you do not have prevalent in your system, breaking down the food you normally cannot, reducing the amount of gas creation. The other solution here is to eliminate or reduce the amount of gas causing sugars you consume by changing your diet. There is a strong correlation that lying down after eating and drinking increases your likelihood of gas. If you have more gas in the morning than during other none-lying-down periods this is a sign to you to eat earlier before you retire for sleep. This is because it’s easier for gas to pass from the stomach into the intestines while lying down. Possibly related then would be if you have more gas after lying down, it would be because of this.

    Most common symptoms:
  • Flatulence
  • Abdominal bloating
  • Abdominal pain
  • Belching

  1. Patience, take things slower so you don’t swallow air.
  2. Diet, edit to your nose’s content – or more importantly your neighbor’s.
  3. Supplemental enzymes that digest what you cannot.
  4. Drink more water – this seems to fix all physical ailments.
  5. Exercise, this can even help reduce gas by helping you have more bowel movements.
  6. Have more bowel movements, you should have a bowel movement for every meal you eat technically, so that’s three times a day. This gets rid of that decaying fecal matter sitting in your intestines. (I heard this from the "poo doctor" whose broadcast was on CNN several times in the last two months. I'll add a direct quote/source soon as I can find it.)
  7. Supposedly eating smaller meals through the course of the day, five meals instead of the typical three, can reduce the creation of gas.
  8. An occassional fast may also help.

Gas is also one of the five main stages of matter.

My 9/10ths of a cent
(or BP bite me!)

Gotta drive my wife down to the hospital
we're havin' another kid
Geez! Gas costs a LOT more 'n
just 2 years ago last time we did

Jus' 2 more days 'til payday
so i can fill up my tank
After gas and groceries
won't be hardly any left to bank

Gotta take my brother
to the VA Clinic tomorrow
' wonder if anybody's got
some gas money i can borrow

'got family just 3 states away
I'd sure like to go knockin' on their door
But i just can't afford the gas
to get there an' back no more

HEY! Mr. FAT CAT Oil Baron!
makin' the poor man suffer
for the price of gas ..

Next time i go down to fill up
Why donchya just have 'em
*drag* me outta the car
an' RAPE my ass!!??


And take that damned ancient *marketing* gimmick of 9/10ths *off* the price of gas ..
.. don't add *insult* to *serious* injury!?

Gas is not one of Edward Hopper's better known works. It lacks the fluorescent terror of Nighthawks, the awkward silences of Summer Evening, or the dirty, used feeling that permeates New York Movie. Upon first glance, in fact, it seems like a little slice of Americana that Hopper is best known for; focused, attentive gas man, servicing the pumps which keep your car filled with gas and living the dream. It lacks even the brooding darkness that marks his other representations of buildings, instead offering a bright, incandescent gas station beckoning customers in for fuel and treats before the long drive to wherever.

But this is Edward Hopper we're talking about, the brooding, melancholy, chronically-depressed 6' 7" American Realist whose ennui at the world positively drips out of every canvas he completed. Were he alive today, he would paint nothing but grim strip malls and McDonald's; but then, he was limited to painting ominous shadows over brownstone apartments, and lovely Maine scenery, fouled by a line of telephone poles. He watched the transition of America from bucolic and rural to modernized and electric, and hated it; so many of his paintings show lonely, organic subjects hopelessly alienated from the material progress they find themselves surrounded in. Norman Rockwell would paint the smiling Texaco man in his adorable cap, leave the background blank (to be filled with your all-American aspirations and dreams) and be done with it, having concluded that Gas = good. But Edward Hopper would not be so oblique and obvious. No. There must be something more.

A Closer Look

Let's look at this thing a little closer. There is a gas man in the foreground, servicing a pump. But is he smiling?


Does he have any customers?


Does he, by all accounts, have any reason for getting up in the morning and dressing in his Sunday best other than servicing these towers of steel and glass?

Um, No. I guess not.

Is he dressing in his best solely for the benefit of unfeeling monoliths of petroleum?

I get the point, vonCube. Move on.

Alright. But let's establish the foreground here. We have an unsmiling, mechanical gasman servicing a pump which no-one may have used in hours, if not days. This gas station, which is clearly on a dirt, unimproved road (this was painted in 1940, years before the Interstate paved highway system came into effect), is glowing bright with incandescent goodness, a last beacon of hope and light before the dark, enveloping, coniferous forest which looms, ever-present, in the background. The closer to the road the trees are, the darker they are painted, until the road itself disappears into inky blackness. But wait, look at the sky! Sunset is coming. Soon that darkness which already devoured the forest will be upon the gas station, which with its brightly lit outpost of civilization will keep the light of progress and AMERICA! FUCK YEAH! alive.

Are you sure about that, vonCube? This is Edward Hopper we're talking about, here.

No, I'm not sure of that at all. And in some ways, that's the point. You can read this painting in two entirely different ways, depending on your mental starting point. You can see this as celebrating American progress, a bright outpost of civilization lighting up, and providing fuel and shelter for travellers no matter how desolate the terrain or rough the forest is. If you wanted to, you could see this as a triumph of progress, bringing light to the darkness, advancement to savagery, a warm friendly light of kindness before the black wild forest. Something Norman Rockwell might ruin his pants over.


Or, this is a clever inversion of contemporary values. In this reading, the forest, our home, and source of so much of what builds our civilization, is rendered evil and remote, by placing it darkly in the background, only as an obstacle to be overcome, a threatening presence to be conquered. He's used this forest-as-darkness motif before, in Cape Cod Evening. Never fear though, intrepid Pioneer. Inroads into the wild savagery have been made, benefitting mankind tremendously. This lonely outpost of gas, and treats, manned by a single being in service to machines, and machines only, is the new Paradise on the hill, a last teat of convenience to be weaned off of before embarking into the unknown. Here, the full disconnect between humans and their roots is laid bare for all to see; the nourishing forest is now the evil presence, to be conquered and overcome by all means, one incandescent lightbulb at a time.

Ok, that's a little extreme. Could it be allegory?

Yes, yes it could. Edward Hopper famously battled depression his whole life, and this could be just a simple depiction of it. Sunny brightness, servicing your day; but always looming behind it, depression, melancholy and loneliness. This is why I like it so much, as I feel a real connection with it.

So it could mean any of these things?

All, maybe. Or none. This is where the peculiar genius of Edward Hopper lies; he lays out his landscapes and portraits, stark as could be. A snapshot of time. But he lets you supply the stories. And depending on who you are, or how you feel, that story could be entirely different; he's just the messenger, after all. Take Nighthawks - what is that lonely man up to? Is he going to kill the couple? Is the barkeep in on it? Is the couple as flippant as they seem? Anything could happen with the characters in that canvas. But somehow, you always get the feeling it's going to be bad.

Is that gas attendant going to die?

Yes. By Bears.


You can't see the big brown bear lurking in the background?


Wow. *sighs* Your loss then.

Gas (gas), n.; pl. Gases (-ez). [Invented by the chemist Van Helmont of Brussels, who died in 1644.]


An aëriform fluid; -- a term used at first by chemists as synonymous with air, but since restricted to fluids supposed to be permanently elastic, as oxygen, hydrogen, etc., in distinction from vapors, as steam, which become liquid on a reduction of temperature. In present usage, since all of the supposed permanent gases have been liquified by cold and pressure, the term has resumed nearly its original signification, and is applied to any substance in the elastic or aëriform state.

2. (Popular Usage)


A complex mixture of gases, of which the most important constituents are marsh gas, olefiant gas, and hydrogen, artificially produced by the destructive distillation of gas coal, or sometimes of peat, wood, oil, resin, etc. It gives a brilliant light when burned, and is the common gas used for illuminating purposes.


Laughing gas.


Any irrespirable aëriform fluid.

Gas is often used adjectively or in combination; as, gas fitter or gasfitter; gas meter or gas-meter, etc.

Air gas (Chem.), a kind of gas made by forcing air through some volatile hydrocarbon, as the lighter petroleums. The air is so saturated with combustible vapor as to be a convenient illuminating and heating agent. --
Gas battery (Elec.), a form of voltaic battery, in which gases, especially hydrogen and oxygen, are the active agents. --
Gas carbon, Gas coke, etc. See under Carbon, Coke, etc. --
Gas coal, a bituminous or hydrogenous coal yielding a high percentage of volatile matters, and therefore available for the manufacture of illuminating gas. R. W. Raymond. --
Gas engine, an engine in which the motion of the piston is produced by the combustion or sudden production or expansion of gas; -- especially, an engine in which an explosive mixture of gas and air is forced into the working cylinder and ignited there by a gas flame or an electric spark. --
Gas fitter, one who lays pipes and puts up fixtures for gas. --
Gas fitting.
(a) The occupation of a gas fitter.
(b) pl. The appliances needed for the introduction of gas into a building, as meters, pipes, burners, etc. --
Gas fixture, a device for conveying illuminating or combustible gas from the pipe to the gas- burner, consisting of an appendage of cast, wrought, or drawn metal, with tubes upon which the burners, keys, etc., are adjusted. --
Gas generator, an apparatus in which gas is evolved; as:

(a) a retort in which volatile hydrocarbons are evolved by heat;
(b) a machine in which air is saturated with the vapor of liquid hydrocarbon; a carburetor;
(c) a machine for the production of carbonic acid gas, for aërating water, bread, etc. Knight. --
Gas jet, a flame of illuminating gas. --
Gas machine, an apparatus for carbureting air for use as illuminating gas. --
Gas meter, an instrument for recording the quantity of gas consumed in a given time, at a particular place. --
Gas retort, a retort which contains the coal and other materials, and in which the gas is generated, in the manufacture of gas. --
Gas stove, a stove for cooking or other purposes, heated by gas. --
Gas tar, coal tar. --
Gas trap, a drain trap; a sewer trap. See 4th Trap, 5. --
Gas washer (Gas Works), an apparatus within which gas from the condenser is brought in contact with a falling stream of water, to precipitate the tar remaining in it. Knight. --
Gas water, water through which gas has been passed for purification; -- called also gas liquor and ammoniacal water, and used for the manufacture of sal ammoniac, carbonate of ammonia, and Prussian blue. Tomlinson. --
Gas well, a deep boring, from which natural gas is discharged. Raymond. --
Gas works, a manufactory of gas, with all the machinery and appurtenances; a place where gas is generated for lighting cities. --
Laughing gas. See under Laughing. --
Marsh gas (Chem.), a light, combustible, gaseous hydrocarbon, CH4, produced artificially by the dry distillation of many organic substances, and occurring as a natural product of decomposition in stagnant pools, whence its name. It is an abundant ingredient of ordinary illuminating gas, and is the first member of the paraffin series. Called also methane, and in coal mines, fire damp. --
Natural gas, gas obtained from wells, etc., in Pennsylvania, Ohio, and elsewhere, and largely used for fuel and illuminating purposes. It is chiefly derived from the Coal Measures. --
Olefiant gas (Chem.). See Ethylene. --
Water gas (Chem.), a kind of gas made by forcing steam over glowing coals, whereby there results a mixture of hydrogen and carbon monoxide. This gives a gas of intense heating power, but destitute of light-giving properties, and which is charged by passing through some volatile hydrocarbon, as gasoline.


© Webster 1913

Gas (?), v. t. [imp. & p. p. Gassed (?); p. pr. & vb. n. Gassing.]

1. (Textiles)

To singe, as in a gas flame, so as to remove loose fibers; as, to gas thread.


To impregnate with gas; as, to gas lime with chlorine in the manufacture of bleaching powder.


© Webster 1913

Gas, n.

Gasoline. [Colloq.]


© Webster 1913

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