157 gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgendered/questioning noders!
Updated 23 March 2011
United Kingdom (1987)
(bi) Aberdeen, UK (1981)
Raleigh/Chapel Hill, North Carolina (1984)
Livingston, UK (1975)
(bi) College Park, Maryland
Oakland, CA (1978)
Tel Aviv, Israel (1976)
(bi) Mogadore, Ohio (1987)
Seattle, Washington (1973)
(bi) Detroit, Michigan (1976)
Glasgow, UK (1985)
Manchester, UK (1970)
Seattle, Washington (1984)
(bi) Cary, North Carolina (1984)
(bi) New Jersey
Quartz Hill, California (1980)
Glasgow, UK (1984)
Edinburgh, UK (1979)
Santa Barbara, California (1960)
Chicago, Illinois (1983)
(bi) New York
(bi) Omaha, Nebraska (1991)
Milwaukee, Wisconsin (1980)
Edinburgh, UK (1976)
(polyamorous pansexual) New York City (1976)
Bryan, Texas (1984)
(unspecified) Copenhagen, Denmark (1959)
(bi) Washington, DC
Ada, Ohio (1985)
Cincinnati, Ohio (1979)
(bi) Placerville, California (1962)
Albuquerque, New Mexico (1977)
(bi) Minnesota (1968)
(bi) British Columbia, Canada (1983)
Washington, DC (1981)
Denver, Colorado (1976)
East Lansing, Michigan (1983)
(bi/trans) Wiltshire, UK (1984)
fuzzy and blue
Owensboro, Kentucky (1975)
(pansexual) Chicago, Illinois
New York City (1978)
(trans-bi) Middletown, Ohio (1987)
(bi) Davis, California
Portland, Oregon (1976)
San Francisco, California (1984)
I'm The Pumpkin King
Los Angeles, California (1980)
(bi, poly) Fort Worth, Texas (1985)
New York (1981)
Chicago, Illinois (1985)
Linköping, Sweden (1981)
(bi) (only out on E2)
Chicago, Illinois (1985)
Evansville, Indiana (1965)
Kansas City, Missouri (1978)
(bi) Kansas City, Missouri (1984)
New York City (1977)
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania (1986)
Manchester, UK (1975)
Moscow, Idaho (1984)
(bi, maybe) Baltimore, Maryland
Chattanooga, Tennessee (1983)
Birmingham, UK (1983)
(bi) Birkenhead, UK (1984)
Prince Edward Island, Canada (1981)
Denver, Colorado (1980)
(trans online) Las Cruces, New Mexico (1978)
(bi) British Columbia, Canada
San Diego, California
Boston, Massachusetts (1982)
Sydney, Australia (1975)
Glasgow, Scotland (1989)
Newport News, Virginia (1990)
(bi) Anaheim, California (1973)
Lexington, Kentucky (1981)
(bi) Massachusetts (1981)
(bi) Mainz, Germany (1972)
(bi) Philadelphia, Pennsylvania (1980)
(bi/trans) Oakland, California
Albuquerque, New Mexico (1979)
(bi) Edinburgh, Scotland (1978)
Lincoln, Nebraska (1978)
Santa Barbara, California (1968)
Raleigh, North Carolina (1985)
Birmingham, UK (1985)
(bi) Portland, Oregon (1982)
The Netherlands (1982)
Cambridge/Somerville, Massachusetts (1977)
Los Angeles, California (1982)
London, UK (1976)
(bi) Vancouver, Canada (1982)
(trans) Seattle, Washington
(bi) Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania (1983)
Birmingham, UK (1986)
Leicester, UK (1989)
Baltimore, Maryland (1977)
(bi) West Hartford, CT (1956)
Lexington, Kentucky (1981)
Little Rock, Arkansas (1985)
Los Angeles, California (1976)
(asexual) Rhyl, UK (1986)
Brooklyn, New York (1977)
so save me
Birmingham, UK (1986)
(bi) Texas (1981)
Boston, Massachusetts (1977)
Birmingham, UK (1975)
Columbus, Ohio (1968)
San Francisco, California
(bi) Australia (1992)
Sacramento, California (1986)
(bi) Dublin, Ireland
Holland, Michigan (1987)
(bi) Walnut Creek, California (1971)
(bi) United Kingdom
New Jersey (1984)
(bi) Philadelphia, Pennsylvania (1979)
(bi) (only out on E2) Ann Arbor, Michigan (1982)
Spokane, Washington (1980)
Centreville, VA (1984)
(bi) Toronto, Canada (1974)
(bi) Seattle, Washington
Heyworth, Illinois (1957)
(gender neutral) Brooklyn, New York (1977)
Madison, Wisconsin (1976)
Houston, Texas (1965)
(bi) Wales, UK (1979)
Denver, Colorado (1979)
Oulu, Finland (1979)
Santa Barbara, California (1978)
Norfolk, UK (1974)
Ontario, Canada (1985)
Blab to Wiccanpiper (below) if you have questions/corrections, or want on/off the list
(include your city of residence and year of birth, if you'd like)
You don't have to belong to the Outies usergroup to get your name up here, by the way.
Outies is a social usergroup for noders who identify themselves as homosexual, bisexual, transgendered or just differently gendered. We also welcome those who are questioning their developing sexuality and feel they may identify with our group, but basically we're "Queers Only" here.
If you'd like to join, you should know that the message traffic in this usergroup can sometimes be very high (as in edev-level). However, at other times there is no traffic for days. We're either flooding each other's message inboxes, or half-forgetting that we're even in the group. Note that as of March 2004, this usergroup is no longer moderated! Lots of off-topic prattle and inane ranting may and does occur. If the idea of logging on to find 150+ group messages within 24 hours really bothers you, Outies might not be your cup of tea.
If you do decide to join, we also add your name to the list of "Out" Everythingians (above). You don't have to be "out" in real life, just online. If you are "out" in real life, that's great! But we won't treat you any differently if you're not.
To join or leave this usergroup, message Wiccanpiper below.
I love you - but I don't. I don't really know you, after all. I've been on over ten dates with you, I've spent the night twice in your big white bed and pristine house. I know your skin and your hair and your sweet favorite perfume (that's exactly the same as mine); I know your freckles and your nipples and your unbelievably sweet little cunt. I know your eyes that change from hazel to brown and that can't stop looking at me, making me feel uncomfortable now, although I used to love it.
I also know how you taste, your skin, your mouth, your pussy so tight and close to virginal. You lived with that spouse for so many years, the one who didn't like sex, and now you're so closed to sex you don't even know it. I want to open you up, show you how it really can be.
You have one orgasm and you say you have to stop now, and rest. You have never had multiple orgasms, you don't really know what I'm talking about; your pussy is dry on the outside and wet on the inside because you're so closed down and tight, the wetness doesn't come out. Your clothes are never wrinkled or dirty; your hair is never messy. I've seen you without makeup once, in the morning. With a brave face you announced that it was off and I looked. I saw more freckles and that's all.
You're younger than me but your skin tells your age. Your face is so sweet and clear and your lips are a bit thin but very kissable still. When I see you, I want to kiss you and hold you more than I want to make love. And I don't want to love you. I don't want to fall in love. I don't want to fall in love with a woman. I am trying not to resist it but a lifetime of heterosexual training is blocking my feelings.
We are worlds apart culturally; you wanted a doctor, someone rich who could help you with your $100,000 student loans. I wanted an artist or a musician (maybe) or a writer. You listen to jazz and Sade and wear prep attire, I have facial piercings and listen to punk and industrial goth and live in jeans. Eventually, I do want the mental challenge and the cultural lock from being with some one who is like me but not; but not quite yet.
And I wasn't prepared for love to come over me when I wanted to sleep around. I want to meet many women, explore this mesmerizing world now open to me, the world of females and art with my freedom intact. I've only felt this soul connection with two others, two of my most intense and memorable lovers.
If you were male, I have no doubt that I would have fallen in love with you by now. When I am with you I find myself wanting to whisper in your ear, "I love you," sometimes. And sometimes I feel nothing, I am stone cold dead inside. I cannot bring any feelings out even though I know something is happening. It's too heady, too much of a threat to who I thought I was. And I have no control over this process, except for my behavior; how much I talk to you, how much I see you, what I tell you.
Why do I care so much? Would I care less if I was sans children? What if my kids were truly grown and long gone? How can I fall in love with a woman? How can I not? I want you to be different, yet it's your soul that I truly love. The passion I feel for you is hot and I feel affection for you but I want to be detached and separate, not in love with a woman; I don't want to fall for you.
GSAs, or Gay-Straight Alliances, are school organizations which exist to make members of all sexual and gender orientations feel welcome and safe, primarily in the sometimes confusing and ignorant world that is high school. They can also be found in middle schools and universities, sometimes under alternate names which try to sound less gay-exclusive (see below). GSAs endeavor to educate the school community about GLBTQ issues, and create a more positive school environment that is accepting of people of any orientation.
The Gay Straight Alliance website reports that the first GSA-type club was founded in Europe over 50 years ago. Kevin Jennings, founder of GLSEN, takes credit for forming the first American GSA, circa 1988, although it's plausible that groups with similar aims existed before then. Meanwhile, GLSEN reports registering over 3000 GSAs. Other organizations such as the GSA Network claim to have helped to form and connect GSAs in 50% of California high schools alone. GSAs are also currently growing in number in Canada and elsewhere abroad.
GSAs were formed to fight the pervasive homophobia in many sectors of society, working alongside a gay movement that has grown stronger and more visible in the past few decades. Despite the modern history of gay activism, many people do not understand the implications of not simply being straight, or not even knowing what gender one really is. Ignorance breeds contempt, fear, teasing, persecution. Too many people have been lost because they did not know there was somewhere they could go. GSAs offer safe havens and like minds, and are all the stronger because they include accepting straight people in their ranks.
The existence of GSAs isn't nearly as interesting as the controversy surrounding that fact. That many people do not want to allow GSAs to meet at all -- who either misunderstand GSA's aims, or understand them fully and do not like them -- shows that GSAs have their work cut out for them. GSAs are generally protected under the 1st Amendment (freedom of assembly, freedom of expression) in United States public schools. However, sometimes they are denied school sponsorship and the ability to publicize their existence. Some schools even disband all clubs rather than be forced to let GSA continue. I can't speak for private schools, but seeing as private education is generally undertaken at one's (or one's guardian's) own will, they are under less or no obligation to allow a GSA; YMMV.
Goals of a GSA
"Isn't it just a hookup club for gay kids?"
No. Although there has been a lot of progress made toward tolerance of LGBTQ people and their lifestyles, there is still a lot of stigma surrounding coming out and being lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender/transsexual, or just plain questioning your orientation. Furthermore, friends of LGBTQ people can also suffer discrimination and isolation. GSAs exist so that students know there is a place where they can meet other people who understand what they may be going through. If you've ever felt bullied and isolated, you will know how important this opportunity is.
GSAs try to promote positive awareness and understanding of LGBTQ issues -- from the impact of AIDS on the entire community, to just what being gay means. This is often accomplished by organizing participants in the Day of Silence, National Coming Out Day, Ally Week, and other activities. Also, "straight allies" are critically important: whether they know it or not, most people probably have a LGTBQ friend or relative, and if people see a straight person who associates with "queers," they may reconsider the impact of their own attitudes and behavior.
To put it simply, GSAs exist to prove that LGBTQ people are, indeed, everyday people like you and me. Knowing that makes it a lot harder to be hurtful and intolerant. And GSAs exist to reassure their members of this, too.
"What do you do in a GSA?"
What do you normally do when you hang out with friends
? A meeting might be just sitting and chatting about school and life
. Meetings at my GSA have involved or will involve:
- Planning a float for the homecoming parade
- Discussing LGBTQ-related literature
- Watching movies, either LGBTQ-themed or just fun and flaming
- Preparing for the Day of Silence
- Making videos on GSA's purpose and LGBTQ tolerance
- Fundraising for club activities
- Advertising for Pride Prom
- Trying to recruit more members
The possibilities, quite simply, are endless.
Not everyone at GSA is gay!
Remember, one of the most important characteristics of a GSA is its incorporation of straight people who are uncomfortable with the way GLBTQ folk are sometimes treated
. And generally, it's not polite to assume someone at the club is gay -- or to ask. Would you ask such a question of a stranger you passed in the hall? No? Then why ask in the classroom?
(To illustrate that not everyone in a GSA is gay, as the treasurer of my own high school GSA, I know several friends who attend our meetings who are quite straight. But this isn't the point.
The point is that orientation makes no difference in who you are and how you should be treated. Somehow, it takes a lot of telling before people grasp this primary theme of GSA.)
"Okay, so how do I join?"
Oftentimes, school websites advertise the existence of all school organizations, including where and when they meet. This is a good first resource. You might also want to watch the halls for posters, or inquire to a counselor
. Many schools, of course, still don't have a GSA, but this is merely an opportunity for a group of friends to start their own
Having transferred from a private Catholic school to a (co-ed!) public school, one of the first things I did was seek out the GSA. Even though I've long learned to turn a deaf ear toward one-off insults, I can attest that meeting and knowing so many supportive friends and faculty brightens one's mood a lot. If you're in school and looking for support, companionship, and friendship -- doesn't matter if you're gay or straight, boy or girl or in between -- I highly recommend joining or organizing a GSA. Oh, and as for my orientation...who cares? I would have joined regardless.
Notes and Thanks
Timeshredder pointed out the rather lacking American history I originally provided. If anyone knows of US GSAs before 1988, feel free to /msg me and I'll update and expand accordingly.
Apollyon informs me that "The local university calls their lbgtq soc 'FAB GLITTER'" -- Fetish, Allies, Bisexual, Gay, Lesbian, Intersexed, Transgender, Transsexual Engendering Revolution. Talk about a mouthful...ooh, don't take that the wrong way...
Gay Straight Alliance - http://www.gaystraightalliance.org/
Gay-Straight Alliance Network - http://www.gsanetwork.org/
GLSEN: Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network - http://www.glsen.org/cgi-bin/iowa/student/student/index.html
ACLU lawsuits for GSAs - http://www.aclu.org/lgbt/youth/12044prs20030122.html
Wikipedia - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay_straight_alliance
GSA Network has several useful pages on finding and organizing GSAs:
California GSA directory - http://www.gsanetwork.org/directory/index.html
How to Start a GSA - http://www.gsanetwork.org/resources/start.html
Resources - http://www.gsanetwork.org/resources/index.html
In the first week of October 2008 much of the British press reported on the tale of the Church of England clergyman who was arguing that gay men should be forced to have sodomy warnings tattooed on their backsides.
The clergyman in question was the Reverend Dr Peter Mullen, who was the rector of both St Michael's Cornhill and St Sepulchre-without-Newgate within the City of London. The former described itself as being "traditional Church of England" as it still uses the King James Bible and the 1662 version of the Book of Common Prayer in its services, whilst the latter merely asserted its claim to being the "largest church in the City of London" although it also had a claim to fame as the last resting place of Captain John Smith, the first Governor of the state of Virginia. It also turned out that the Reverend Mullen was the Chaplain to the Stock Exchange. Which was no doubt news to many people, who didn't realise that the London Stock Exchange had a chaplain, although no doubt there were many in the Square Mile who would have been grateful for any crumbs of comfort in these troubled times. (It also transpired that he was the honorary chaplain to the Freedom Association, which meant little other than it indicated where the Reverend Mullen's political sympathies might lie.)
It turned out that the Reverend Mullen was in the habit of occasionally posting his thoughts on his own blog, and had first raised the idea of the 'sodomy warning tattoo' back on the 19th June 2008. Having expressed his view that the "AIDS pandemic was originally caused by promiscuous homosexual behaviour", the Reverend Mullen went on to say was that it was therefore "time that religious believers began to recommend specific utilitarian discouragements of homosexual practices after the style of warnings on cigarette packets: Let us make it obligatory for homosexuals to have their backsides tattooed with the slogan SODOMY CAN SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR HEALTH and their chins with FELLATIO KILLS." For good measure the good Reverend also offered the opinion that "obscene 'gay pride' parades and carnivals should be banned" on the grounds that they gave rise to "passive corruption, comparable to passive smoking" and that "young people forced to witness these excrescences are corrupted by them".
These remarks were in fact inspired by the recent controversy regarding the actions of the Reverend Martin Dudley, the rector of St Bartholomew the Great, which was also to be found in the City of London. It was a few days earlier that the Reverend Dudley had conducted a service of blessing for two homosexual men who had earlier registered their civil partnership shortly before the ceremony. In itself this was contrary to the guidelines issued by the Church of England which did not permit the formal blessings of gay relationships, whilst the "language and grandeur of the service" adopted by the Reverend Dudley was seen as being both highly provocative and blasphemous. Even more 'scandalous' was the fact that the two homosexual men in question were the Reverend Peter Cowell and Reverend Dr David Lord.
It was this 'outrageous' occurrence which had early inspired the Reverend Mullen to exercise his poetic talents in a verse entitled 'Gay wedding at St Bartholomew's EC1', which he posted on his blog on the 18th June and concluded with the couplet;
I'm C of E and PC so don't think it odd of me
To offer a licence and blessing for sodomy
He then however, felt obliged to return to the subject on the following day, having been apparently annoyed at some remarks that The Times columnist Matthew Parris had to say on the subject.
As it was no one took a great deal of notice of the Reverend Mullen's suggestions regarding the tattooing of health warnings on homosexuals or indeed his lyrical musings on the subject. Until that is, the Evening Standard ran a story under the headline 'Chaplain: Gay men should have sodomy warning tattoos' on the 6th October 2008.
The Standard drew the matter to the attention of the Right Reverend Richard Chartres, the Bishop of London, and the diocese duly issued a formal statement in which it recognised that "the content" of the text referred to was "highly offensive" and was also "in no way reflective of the views of the Diocese of London", whilst a "source" added that the Mullen's comments were "being looked at internally within the Diocese" and that he faced "disciplinary procedures". As far as the Reverend Mullen was concerned he claimed that he had merely written some "satirical things" which were "of the tradition of English satire", and that he had "nothing against homosexuals" since many of his "dear friends" were "of that persuasion", although he did disapprove of the "militant preaching of homosexuality".
The story in the Standard was soon reproduced in many other newspapers both in Britain and abroad, and attracted much comment, as well as the usual calls for the Reverend Mullen's resignation. But oddly enough there was no explanation as to what had prompted the Evening Standard to actually run the story some four months after the Reverend Mullen had first posted his remarks, whilst it was clear that the he had received some kind of forewarning of the impending media interest, as visitors to his blog at http://petermullen.typepad.com were greeted with the message "This site closing temporarily. Closing for now." which was dated "October 03, 2008", some three days before the Standard story was published.
It must be said that the Reverend Mullen was, as they say, no stranger to controversy, as he had earlier attracted some attention as a result of the remarks he made during the sermon he preached at the City New Year Service held at St. Michael's Cornhill on the 11th January 2008, in which he likened the Archbishop of Canterbury to a "wraith-like political druid on his way to another synod debate on the pagan fantasy of global warming".
Indeed global warming appeared to be one of the Reverend's bête noires as writing in his blog on the 17th September 2007 he had denounced the whole idea as a "politically-motivated myth put forward by the anti-capitalist brigade, associated nihilists who want to drag us back to the stone age: people who actually hate humanity and dress up their malignity in phoney idealism!" A week or so earlier on the 9th September he was to be found complaining about the lack of jokes about Islam, since its "adherents certainly lend themselves to ridicule: sticking their arses in the air five times a day. How about a few little choruses: "Randy Muslims when they die/Find seventy virgins in the sky". Whilst on the 25th July 2007 he felt obliged to note that while a number of his fellow clergy were claiming that the recent floods were "God's punishment for our disordered sex lives", he rather felt that the Almighty had directed the deluge towards the wrong geographical area and that "God's aim seems to have faltered rather since Sodom".
With particular regard to his witticism regarding the Supreme Being's faltering aim it would certainly appear that it was the Reverend Mullen's intention to be humorous. However whilst it might have been his ambition to become the Auberon Waugh of the pulpit, the trouble was that he couldn't escape the temptation to preach at the same time, and it was therefore often difficult to differentiate between the two. Thus whilst it was possible to appreciate the satirical intent of his suggestion of tattoos warning of the health dangers of sodomy, considered in the overall context of his piece, it was also easy to see many might have taken his remarks at face value.
It later turned out that the Reverend Mullen was also employed as a columnist for the Darlington based Northern Echo in addition to his various ecclesiatical appointments. On the 14th October 2008 he took the opportunity to devote his column to the subject of 'Why I was wrong' and duly expressed his regret for "making some off-colour jokes about homosexuals", although he also continued to express his opposition to the "corrupting influence of the promotional parades of homosexuality by such as Gay Pride demonstrations" which "lewdly promoted homosexuality as if it were merely part of the entertainments industry".
He did however make reference to the remarks made by Sandy Toksvig on BBC Radio Four's The News Quiz, to the effect that "Peter Mullen is Chaplain to the Stock Exchange – so he must know what it feels like to be completely buggered", and had the good grace to admit that it was "a funnier joke than the remarks I told and a lot better natured" .
Various posts under the headings of, Gay wedding at St Bartholomew's, Matthew Parris, global hot air, Ramadan calendars, The floods as God's punishment, made by Peter Mullen on his blog at http://petermullen.typepad.com/ that were retained in the Google cache at the time of writing.
- Jonathan Wynne-Jones, Male priests marry in Anglican church's first gay 'wedding', 15 Jun 2008
- Robert Mendick and Simon Kirby, Chaplain: Gay men should have sodomy warning tattoos, Evening Standard, 6.10.08
- Riazat Butt, Vicar could be disciplined for blog slurs against gays and Muslims, The Guardian, October 06 2008
- Ruth Gledhill, Chaplain's blog calls for homosexuals to be tattooed, The Times, October 7 2008
- Peter Mullen, Why I was wrong, Northern Echo, 14th October 2008
- The Parish Church of St. Michael's Cornhill in the City of London
- St. Sepulchre-without-Newgate
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