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When I was a kid I once drank an entire bottle of purple Dimetapp because I liked the taste. The label said grape, but it wasn't - it was purple. For those who don't know, Dimetapp, especially the old formula, was a weapons grade cold and cough syrup that was sometimes employed as a non-prescription anesthetic for shitty kids who wouldn't go to sleep or calm down in the airport or whatever.

I don't remember most of the details of the following story, but have heard them enough times that it's hard to remember what's recollection and what's not.

My mother noticed I was being awfully quiet, and found me passed right the fuck out in a pool of purple vomit, mouth haloed with the stuff. To the hospital we went, and for once not for stitches.

I was at the time legendary at the base hospital for having broken out of a pediatric papoose. (Incidentally this answers the question "Have you always been this way?") So despite being approximately like a 1:24 scale…

"I'm bad, and that's good. I will never be good, and that's not bad. There is no one I would rather be. . . than me."

Wreck-It Ralph is Disney's 52nd animated film in the Disney Animated Canon. It was released November 2, 2012, and follows the story of a First-Generation-Donkey-Kong-esque arcade videogame villain named Wreck-It Ralph as he travels through different arcade game worlds, trying to become a hero and win a gold medallion. His motivation? To stick it to the little weebly-ass…

The Douglas DC-9 (later known as the McDonnell Douglas DC-9), was a narrow-body jet airliner with a T-tail and two engines mounted on either side of the rear end of the fuselage. It was one of the most successful airliners of all time; across all variants, including the McDonnell Douglas MD-80 series, the McDonnell Douglas MD-90, and the Boeing 717, a total of more than 2400 DC-9's were built over the course of more than 40 years.


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