and so, i half-heartedly stumbled through the day..

it died. cold and alone, at some (what must have been peculiar) early hour, it left me, after everything we'd been through and i wasn't sure whether or not i cared enough to be upset about it or not. maybe i was just angry, irritated. i'd noticed its decline as of late, but it was not clear to me when it might finally slip from its place in the universe. but it did, just then, at some moment and oh i wish that i could have been there just to see how she died.

i was referring to my 15" monitor.

so we went into the city today, apparently they'd been planning to do so anyway so it was not an extra trip, and now i have this 17" monster. it is not my little 15" and there are no red lines across it, there is no periodic flickering.. i only wonder if i will be able to love it as i did the last. oh woe. actually i don't particularly care, i just thought i'd throw in some overly dramatic crap.

i got some material product today. my eye is twitching. i want a new pillow. i want to wake up with blood in my hand. i want i want i want i want to know how to not want. i do know how. i don't want. i just need. no i don't.

this whole crazy world is just too frustratin'.
All the dayslogs I've ever done, and that's the first time I ever noticed that handy link right at the top of the homenode. Jeez.

Anyway, I have to say (no matter how much it pains me) Windows 2000 Professional ain't half bad. I gotta support it at work, so I figure I'll bite the bullet and throw it on my home machine. It works. I can't break it... well of course I could, but I'd have to try;) It's let me change hardware and bang on it, and it hasn't really crashed. It doesn't like some of the VPN tinkering, but now that it's setup right even that doesn't break it.

More later.

It's later. Like the next day as defined by my sleep schedule. I'm blankly staring at the screen typing this gibberish in an attempt to kickstart the morning. I just finished typing my time tracking into out crappy HR database.

Now there's an app that's kind of typical of the worst of the way things can run around here. It's a terrible, blecherous, and literally lossy database, yet we still use it cause we'd either have to buy one that works or code one that works. Some intern coded this one. It sucks. It will lose whole weeks of data on a whim, but getting the inertia going around here to change it is next to impossible.

I keep hearing from the Notes ppl. "Yeah we could redo that in a week." For chrissake, do it then! But they don't want to touch it because management didn't let them do it in Notes in the first place.

The C++ guys don't want anything to do with it. I think they have an idea how ugly the source is, but in order to protect their turf they aren't going to do a complete rewrite. "See if you work twice as hard you can reuse half this code!" is their attitude. So they spec the job at a man-month. "Too long," says management.

Don't get me started on what the Java team says. No one can ever understand what the hell they're talking about. At times I think we have a Java team so that we can say we have a Java team. No one around here has the foggiest what to do with them. Rumor has it they are the reason we have fruit on our website.

previous | next

My legs are itching like crazy. I only shaved them a little while ago, and they're already driving me insane. No, wait, that not right.. the rest of the world is driving me insane.

Whenever I think about school I get depressed. Really, really depressed. When I'm in school I turn into this self-loathing fake version of myself who pretends to cope with everything. It wears me out and I don't know how much longer I have before it starts to ...

starts to ...

God damn. I don't know what's gonna happen. I've never felt like this before. Everything feels so hopeless... I wish I could just quit school and move to another province. Start over.

I don't want to be here. I want to be --- I want to be left alone.

I don't want people to expect me to change for them. I don't want them to expect from me at all. I don't want to be forced into making a promise I can't keep... and either way I can't keep this promise.

I can't believe I let myself get into this.

If I told anyone what I really thought, I don't even think they'd care.

"Don't be silly", they'd say.

"That's not what you really think", they'd say.

I've never not wanted to do something so much in my life.

I am incredibly tired. I only got two hours of sleep last night after drinking too much and making an ass of myself at a local social function. Thank god that at my age, that sort of thing is still acceptable.

Spent the day watching movies and trying to fall asleep as well as get my new laptop delivered to the right address. It's so close to being here, I can taste it.

I have a midterm tomorrow that I am totally unprepared for. Damn me for being lazy.

      This log encapsulates both Saturday and Sunday, as they tend to merge quite a bit - allow me to explain. After typing that daylog, Jason and I headed out to see Auburn's homecoming game; to avoid having to purchase a ticket I borrowed another student's ID card. We passed clear through, but after turned got too hot we decided to ride around campus and wait for the end of the game - and the following BBQ. Kevin's pad was deserted, but we chilled for a minute and saw if the game was on TV. It wasn't, we kept on driving and ran into Ethan and Robbie, whose three-foot bong I had to decline. After all, I quit. When we ran into Ben, he told us that he already ate, and xnay on the BBQay.


      We picked up some food and played bball with Phil Greer and some other kid, then Jason headed back to take a shower. At Brett's again, people congregated and the bowl was passed. Again, I held to me resolutions of not smoking... We headed out to a neighbor house, where several old SPS people were hanging out, and yes, hitting a bong. It really seems that about half of Auburns population smokes... this is a bad time to quit, I just then realize. About twenty-five people (everyone in the room) smoked, filling the air with that scent. I begin to see the evening turning to shite otherwise, I hit it. Immediately afterwards I felt like crap, once again. This time though, it was kind bud. Soon after, I was feeling better. I knew this was the last time I'd smoke it, I never even consider it unless I'm surrounded - which won't be the case at GT. Maybe it's some type of social addiction, it'd be interesting to look into. This high group joined with another at another apartment, which included the girl I had met the night before. We talked until she had to get ready, then proceeded to a Phi party with a bunch of SPS graduates. More talk ensued, she thanked me for the many complements she had received on the outfit I had helped her pick. I radiated. She had used her fake to get in, and offered to get me a beer - she returned with it, singing, and stuck the change in my shirt pocket, an inch from my face. ^_^

As the place was clearing out, we all returned to hers. There wasn't a lot of talk in the car, but once back at her's we talked and I got her number and email addy.


      I was on cloud nine - Brett lives two doors down, so we trolled back to his place. Jessica, Pat and Brett were chilling, the whole room was smoke filled. We all talked for a good three hours, possibly the best three hours of the whole trip. We had all barely known each other in high school, but through the narcotics we all bonded. It was great, we remnisced and talked about the positive aspects of everyone... regardless of how hippy-ish it sounds, it was incredible... actual lasting bonds were formed. Maybe this is the use of drugs? That, in our times, people lack the communalistic sense of the nineteen sixties and use extasy and kind bud to make up for it... Around four-thirty, we returned to Jason's, made some cereal and watched Simpsons.

"You know you smoke too much of that shit - that shit's gonna rob you of your ambition!" - "Not if my ambition is to get high and watch TV all day." -Jackie Brown.

The drive back was beautiful though tiring - heading west, I was able to watch the entire sunset over the time of three hours.

Cody makes his homework fun!

cool night air, it was raining earlier, but not now. now there's just that smell in the air. wet, damp, earthy smell, a clean fresh smell juxtaposed against the dark smell of wet decaying leaves. i sit outside my doorway under the floodlights. Serge Gainsbourg on inside. marble pocky to snack on. normaly this would be an occasion for tea but well, i just got that new coffee press and lets face it: coffee matches with marble pocky in ways that hot tea never could. the only difference between what i'm doing and how i'd otherwise be spending the evening is that i'm reading chapter 18 on Neolithic societies instead of Moby Dick. Yay homework!

I've developed tastes that are beyond my means

it started 3 years ago. working customer service for Thomasville Furniture. though i can afford nothing more than cheap prefab particle board, i desire so much more. every time i go furniture shopping the fascist comes out. "those drawers don't even have dovetail joints!" or "say, those chairs aren't glued, grooved and screwed. what are you trying to sell me!"

since then i've developed appreciations for fine wine, fine cigars, quality liquors. i can no longer stand to eat fast food. this lifestyle is rather rough on my poor college student budget. where am i going with this, you ask? well, today, a trip to the nearest retailer of fine wines. as i walk in the clerk gives me the usual "buy your damn boone's and get out" glance. it's to be expected though, i don't exactly look the connoisseur part. nobody expects the shaggy, scrawny kid in the transformers t-shirt to tell them that the inferior Chianti they've suggested is far too tannic and unfit even for winos.

Somehow, when I wasn't looking, I became desirable

i've never really thought myself to be anything other than, well, average or even goofy looking i guess. but recently, having a discussion with some friends i found out that several of my female aquaintences think i'm cute/had crushes on me. i've even been referred to as a "babefest" at some point. friday night i went to a party with my neighbors. i didn't know anybody there and normaly i'm very shy and introverted. but get some drinks in me and i become quite a sociable fellow. (there are pictures to prove that i have a tendancy to become quite the naked fellow too, but that's another node...) unfortunately i got too many drinks in me and spent the rest of the evening in a stupor on the couch before i could chat it up with the cute short haired girl in glasses, but none the less, the next morning i found two phone numbers in my pocket that i didn't remember collecting.

i'm starting to find out that it feels pretty damn good to have self confidence.

Hello fellow Noder

tomorrow discofever is coming into town to see Dismemberment Plan at Rubber Gloves and is spending the night on my couch. this will be the first time i've ever met another everythingian in person. I'm not sure what to expect.

(recorded earlier)

i stink. i can feel the itching under my skin that signals the approach of zits everywhere. ..everywhere i have zombie makeup. i'm tired and when i look at white light, i see things dancing around in it. my stomach is growling, but food is very low on my list of priorities. but it's worth it..

i am an all freakin' night 2000 supervictim!

i spent about ten of the previous 24 hours at the capitol theater, observing and taking part in the yearly all-night horror movie festival that's a subset of the olympia film festival. i dressed like a zombie and won prizes and hit the reef for 6am happy hour and saw five quality fright films.

between full-length movies, there were a few shorts. and i smoked a lot of cigarettes. i got to bob for human heads in a pool of blood with everyone else who dressed as a zombie. i won a leech woman (push the button on her back to see her leech wiggle! comes with plastic dagger!), even though i didn't grab any heads and i wasn't really trying very hard.

we agreed that, as weird as all freakin' night had become by about 9am, the peak of the surreality was 6am happy hour. in the morning, the reef is exactly like an airport bar. only on this particular morning, it was packed. weird shit.


i slept till 5pm. i got up and took a prolog exam. i realized that i don't really know what an accumulator is and i left my prolog book at home.

i love being young and stupid.
I'm turning my computer off when I go to bed. I've graduated from computer-and-lights-on-all-day to lights-off-when-asleep to turning off the monitor and music as well and finally to shutting everything down and turning off the noisy box rather than just keeping it going until it crashes.

I think that this is an important step towards reclaiming my computer-room-with-a-bed-in-it as a bedroom-with-a-computer-in-it.

in our last episode... | p_i-logs | and then, all of a sudden...

I miss not having a blank slate, being a kid. If I could wake up every day with amnesia... I dunno that I'd wish it on myself every day, but just once I'd like to experience amnesia. Don't ask me why- it would just be something pretty interesting to experience- provided I could get my memory back.

In an effort to prevent a total loss of memory, I have a lot of my life archived in journal entries, an autobiography-in-progress, millions of words in stories, thousands of emails... I'm a literary pack-rat. The stuff I'd be greeted with, if I ever made it home after being stricken with amnesia, would give me a pretty good sense of who I am, from my own perspective, I think. I hope.

But I wonder what others would tell me about myself, under the assumption that I forgot who I was and they knew. Good things? Bad things? Would I then be able to discern who my real friends were and who they weren't? Would I care? All kinds of questions crop up when I think about the possibility of losing my memory, not to know who I am.

If I ever got my memory back, would I be a changed man? Is amnesia a sort of waking return from death without actually dying? How does one's self-image change, if at all, when they try to overcome amnesia? I dunno, but I'd like to find out. I've never met an amnesiac... maybe that'd be a safer way to answer my questions about it... but it's something to dwell upon, I guess. I won't actively go out and bonk myself on the head in the hopes of losing my memory, but if it happens I wonder what it'd be like?


My last night's masterpiece:

Some Terragen, some Blender, some GIMP. I was inspired by the last night's illuminative discoveries about Microsoft...


Whoa! I just won Pick Up The Phone Booth And Die... It was actually a lot easier game than I thought =) =)

I haven't beaten text adventures for a loooong time... maybe I should finish writing that epic furry text adventure someday?


The... darkness... the... darkness...


I tried to get to sleep at around midnight, but "tiger can't lose its stripes"... I got a great idea to overcome the lack-of-raw-mode-in-Java thing, and downloaded Jasmin (Java bytecode assembler) and perljvm (that didn't work because I don't have a freshish Perl). Guess what the latter were for.

Anyway, then I decided to nuke Perl 5.004 that was still sitting at my HD; and I noticed liburi-perl, and thought, "my, just the functions that I need!" and went happily to update my fakelinker script.

Duh, it's 2 o'clock in the night... I should really start paying attention to Times When I'm Supposed To Be Asleep. Dammit, I'm more creative (and more depressed, sadly) in the night, it seems...

Other day logs o' mine...

Noded today by y.t.: Hello Cruel World Quoting URLs in Perl
Updated: Small Helpful Scripts for Noders

sleeping on empty dreams.

sometimes I wish I didn't decide to be happy, now that my smile is almost phony and I can hear the phone ringing. I pick it up now, instead of leaving it be, there on the floor ringing endlessly. it's a kind of monster, casting shadows on my features, and I just think I should scream. but I don't scream...

all in all, sometimes I see it. another expression there, across the room, where I see reflections of myself. she'll almost smile until she knows it's just me.

are you ever aware of your own consciousness? the boy says to me he thinks he's going mad, he wonders why he is living life, if there is a meaning. he should see a shrink, he says, maybe he's insane. I just laugh my silly laugh, as if. as if.

are we insane?

I don't know about you, but I think I love the boy. all these damn boys, all over. boys boys boys. boy crazy.

Tamiya is her name. she says hello to me now and then, and I look at her, those eyes that read my eyes, those hands that reach into my mind. she says hello to me and I wonder why I bother with the boys at all.

do you think we could run away, just drive and drive and see where we end up? it's too much effort, sometimes. too much effort to have things that make sense. too much effort to not cry. you know?

I just want to be consumed again. kind of liked it there, where everything was darker, and everything more real. where it was truth instead of this. this light. this daylight. this silly little thing. I don't know. I like to not know, because then it's better. then you have a reason. a reason to be jaded and cynical and sad. it's comforting there, even if it isn't right. it's comforting to hold yourself together, just barely.

back | days | forth

12:35 BST

Back to Work

I am so tired. My legs ache to the core as though I have just run a marathon up a 45o gradient. I can hardly concentrate and my eyes keep going blurry.

But apart from that, I am enjoying being back at work! All the things that people were supposed to do without me haven't been done; I have a huge task list in front of me. Well, I suppose it proves my value to the team It's also nice hearing everybody's news and gossip, as well as all the sympathy and fetching and carrying everyone is doing for me :-)

I think I really needed this break (ha) from work. Several things that would have really stressed me out have gone almost unnoticed this morning. From obnoxious project leaders to silly corporate politics, I am unfazed.

Stuff I'm doing: Teaching a new girl about linux, installing a Java development environment on my Linux box, thinking about playing with some web pages, sorting out our silly source code storage server and generally easing myself back into things.

It's strange
that I have had nothing on my mind
except her, meeting her and seeing her
Nothing on my mind but her
Yet still I get things done
still I manage to get through the day
but this time I am smiling inwardly

More later peeps...

Exercise log:
  • Situps: 65 (I might have been doing them wrong the other day.)
  • Pushups: 30 (Man, I feel buff.)
  • Side-kicks: 30 (Ow, my ass!)
Insomnia: None. I fell asleep early and slept for a whole 12 hours before getting up with plenty of time for work. It's nice to be well-rested, but I feel like a slacker who wasted an extra four hours of life. Then again, I'd probably just have played video games for those four hours, anyway.
Tongue log: Doesn't hurt at all today and the swelling is gone down a little. There's still an odd little divot in the top of my tongue around the top bead, which I hear is normal and should go away. In other news, I can't stop thinking about what it'd be like to kiss that girl I like, once both of our tongues heal.

The other advantage to sleeping so long is that you have plenty of time to dream.

Today was quite boring. My parents and I were arguing earlier over weather I had to go to their church. I'm sick of being forced to go with them every sunday, it ruins the entire day. They make my atheism feel like a thought crime.

School was the usual, though I seem to have proven that I am truly a cold hearted bastard and selfish to boot. Some girl says "your hair looks nice", to which I respond "I know." Shoulda said "Thank You" but oh well. Since I was out on friday, it seems like I missed a bunch of stuff, but the teachers don't really seem to care. I got out of Sociology since I had a test. I still feel like something strange is going on around me, I can't put my finger on it, but there's someone or something that's going to happen, the question is when.

13:00 San Francisco time

Jetlag has advantages. I was awake at 5:30, down for breakfast at 6:00, and hanging off the side of a tram at 8:30 on my way to Fisherman's Wharf. The trams on that line are fun, wooden and clunky, reminds me of Vienna.

So by 9:00 I'm sitting at the little beach on Fisherman's Wharf, eyes closed, listening to the waves folding in on each other. Couple that sound with the lack of a mobile phone and I haven't been this relaxed all year.

I keep being mistaken as being part of a couple when I eat with my colleague whose also over for the conference. It amuses me :) This is a fun city, I'd quite happily live here instead of London. Anyone want to marry me and give me a green card? I cook well and I don't snore, and getting a job in a .com shouldn't be a problem. Applications to "Get the hell out of London, SE23, England".

Still no sign of that high level noder even crediting his web site ripoff. Hopefully the editors are on his case. It just annoys me to see the stolen nodes get cooled.

On 9/10/00 I bought a SkyChair (a hanging canvas swing-y deal) at the New York RenFaire. I finally got around to attempting to hang it up today. Obviously, since it has to support my full body weight, the gigantic eye screw needs to be driven into a beam. I probe a couple of times with a power drill, in 16" increments from the side wall, with no luck. Switching to reckoning from the front wall, I hit hard wood in the first hole. Voila, I think, sink the eye screw into the ceiling as far as it goes, and within 1/2 hour it's knotted, adjusted, and ready for a test drive.
I ease into the chair, swing a little, then sit still as I mentally plan where to put the computer desk, etc. That's when the knot slips and I drop a full foot to land on my tailbone. Ow. Screw.
OK, my knot technique is flawed. I readjust the whole shebang, strategically position a pillow lest I fall again, and gingerly climb back on. The revised knot is visibly superior to my first attempt, and I relax. Better stress it a little to make sure it will hold... I bounce a bit, and the knot tightens visibly.
Thudd! Suddenly I'm on the floor again, plaster and ceiling tile and shim raining down on my head. When the dust settles, I look up to a row of three square-foot ceiling tiles ripped away, and a clear view right up into an unfinished corner of the attic. What I thought was a beam was merely an ancient slat, and three layers of historical ceiling finish would have put my exploratory drilling about a quarter inch short of finding a beam. I reckon I'm just a fool with a power tool...

Tex's tip of the day :

Never take a semester off of college.

Today marks the first day back in college for me in 6 years. I could no longer stand around and soak up the fruits of my current good, yet static job.
Tonight I start taking classes again, I'm a little apprehensive, but I think that this will be fun. Hoping this single class will be a refresher of college life, so that I will continue with it next semester.

This weekend was very hectic for me. Yesterday alone I had a total of 21 random visitors come to my home. Now, I like company as much as the next guy, but Geez, cut a guy some slack.

Aren't mothers great? My mother just randomly came by my house this weekend and brought me all sorts of really good stuff. Brownies, peanut butter cereal treats, and yeast rolls. I love my mommy.

If you haven't seen the new Jackie Chan movieShanghai Noon, don't waste your money. I am a Jackie Chan nut, and (obviously) a western fan, but this movie sucked. Don't get me wrong, it had some awesome moves in it, but it had a really weak story line, and without a good storyline you have no movie.

I love Seattle!

I went to Seattle this weekend, and I love it! I have only been to Seattle on two other occasions, which were both about 8 years ago, and didn't get to see much of the city either time. This weekend my boyfriend (who used to live there) and I went there and had the best time. We went to the Seattle Art Museum, the Experience Music Project, Gasworks Park, Archie McPhee's, and other various cool places. It was a ton of fun. Of course, as a result, I'm very tired today since we got home a little later than expected.

I got the CD player I like set up on the Win95 box finally. It was a bitch to configure it around the proxy server. I still can't get Real player or Winamp to work, so I can't listen to any internet streaming audio that depends on those apps. I'm so glad that I can have music in my cube now, although it is turned down very low so I don't disturb the people around me.

I need to get some posters for my cube, or go through the ones I do have looking for something work appropriate. My walls are way too empty. Actually, I purchased some funky posters at Archie McPhee yesterday that I might bring in. They are 70's educational posters designed for little kids that say things like "Eat Good Food" and "Play Every Day". Once the year is over, I will tear up my kitchen calendar for pictures. I really like the pictures of castles in it.

I'm sad that I missed the E2 Portland tea, but that trip to Seattle had been planned for weeks and this was the only weekend we could go because of Alex's midterms that he had to write (he teaches college). Ah well... there will be more activities in the future that I should be able to attend. :)

Only 90 minutes of work left. Today has been an OK day. I really need to work on writing more nodes, so I think I will try to write a couple inbetween phone calls in the next 90 minutes.

Nodes That I Wrote Recently:

You should read the The Great Grand E2 Book Lotto node.

CD’s I’ve Listened To Today:
Garbage - Version 2.0
Fiona Apple - Tidal
Revolution magazine CD for November 2000
Portishead - Roseland NYC Live
Tracy Chapman - self titled
Revolution magazine CD for September 2000
R.E.M. - Eponymous
Liz Phair - Exile In Guyville

Today’s Horoscope on my Calendar (Aries) - Stay aboveboard in all your dealings as the Sun enters Scorpio. Secret maneuvers and underhanded plans are anathema. Study up on new tax laws, insurance rates, and mutual funds. Conduct a massive cleanup effort at home.

Bought the new Radiohead today, Kid A. Awesome. I loved their performance on Saturday Night Live this weekend. Idioteque is particularly good. Makes me want to break out all the other albums and listen to them all, if I had 'em. Play this one religiously.

Today, day of days, I re-started a relationship.

Wait, that didn't come out correctly. Not a relationship, as in dating or whatnot. A very real, powerful, relationship with my 'pod person'.

It's still not coming out the right way. Let me try and explain:

There are some people in your life, that you may or may not encounter, who have the ability to change you forever and continue to have an effect on you, no matter where you are or what the circumstances are. She calls them pod people, after Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Like, we're two halves of the same person, and when we get together, it just clicks. It's difficult to explain, but it happens.

So, I found my pod person again today. Not that she was ever lost; we live a few blocks from each other. But tonite, I think that we both sort of realized that we really need each other, but not in a romantic way.

It is very gratifying to know that there is somebody out there who you mean a lot to. It's even more so when they mean a lot to you, too.

I am looking forward to growing old with her; and even though we probably won't be together, I'll still be with her; just as much as she will be with me.

Hello, my name's Muke and I'm failing cinematography...

Actually it's not so bad. The highest grade in the entire class was a B minus, and he's given us the rest of the week to turn in the rest of the assignments.

In Maya class, I'm modelling a bed for our animation project (the webpage has never been updated, but it's not mine, so it's not my fault.)

Anyway, he really liked the bed, so I'm going to get to make a fairy also. Subdivision surfaces aren't so bad. But it's not very easy to put the wrists on the bed. Haha! It's cryptic, but TRUE! The teacher told me I should put wrists on the bed.

While I was in class, the web radio I was listening to suddenly came up with this song. I'd heard the melody before--I have a version of it called Harukunaru Kokyou

I just got deja vu again. Have I done this before?

I put "Harukunaru Kokyou" into Winamp just now to check the title. The name of the file is different from the name in the file. Then the flash hit me, haven't I written a node where I mentioned something like this before?...

--anyway, I had heard "Harukunaru Kokyou" before, and it's a catchy cheerful tune, even though I don't understand it (not only is it in Japanese, but it's sung backwards...). Anyway, this version was called "My Home Sweet Home". It was so soft and sad--I stopped immediately after the first line so far away from my home sweet home--

I nearly cried...

I didn't wait to hear the whole song. I took up my stuff and walked out of class, back to my room and Napstered the song and looked up the lyrics too. Half of them aren't in English either, but sigh...

Wow, what an awesome day.

First you'll be happy to know that I finally got MDK2- if you didn't read my ordeal trying to find it, read my October 22, 2000 node. Ends up that this guy I know saw the BBS post and IMed me. How cool is that? I didn't have to do anything after all! I asked him to drop it in my upload folder through Network Neighborhood, but he was using Windows2000 and couldn't configure it so he could see people on the network. (the reason I suspect is when you install it it asks for a workgroup and a larger workgroup name, if you enter something in for the larger one, you can't see anyone with 9x computers). He tried sending it to me through AIM but I still have AIM 2.0 and refuse to get newer ones (I don't need AOL's latest and more privacy invading spyware). Plus AIM has no new features at all, ICQ has had it all for years.

I really detest using AIM anyway. You can't believe how frustrating it is playing Quake3 or Starcraft and someone IM's you, switching you out of the game. Even if I'm not playing a game, I'd like to finish what I was doing before having talking to them. It's friggin rude to just popup a new window everytime- ICQ behaves itself and just flashes a message in the systray. ICQ doesn't have advertisments either. I can also keep notes in people's info area so I remember who they are. Here at college my Buddy List is friggin huge. It's a pain trying to remember Name-> Face-> Screen Name-> Relationship. ICQ users also have numbers instead of names, so you don't have people on your list named "h0tiee ch1k 45436346" because you can choose any name you want.

Um, anyway sending it through AIM and network wouldn't work. So I suggested DCCing through IRC, but he didn't have IRC and didn't want to download mIRC. Wouldn't you know it, he has ICQ and we send it that way. (wow what an exciting ending!)

Well getting MDK2 with no effort was probably miracle number one for today. Number two would be that my roommate's sick. He's been sick for the past week. He's constantly having dull, constant throbbing headaches, extrememly painful ear trouble, a really digusting "wet" cough, and a bloodshot eye. He decided to go to the doctor yesterday, but noone was open and today he had to go to class. So before class he went to the infirmary here on campus and found out he's sick with THREE different illnesses! A major sinus infection, pinkeye, and this bubble filled with puss+blood is ramming against his ear drum (fun! fun! and fun!). So what's the good news? The medicine should clear up the ear thing in two days, pinkeye's treatable and he's not going to go blind (like he was afraid of), and sinus infection is common and treatable too.

Miracle number three: on the way to the drug store Pete (my roomate) found his wallet, which he had lost for over month, in Gabe's car! Too friggin cool.


Chris is thinking of rewriting his 3d engine, wants me to help. Before it was written using Borland Turbo C++ 3.0 (DOS), with BGI libraries. With BGI we could only do 640x480 and 16 color graphics. I downloaded DJGPP and Allegro libraries so we can make it more impressive. DJGPP is a free C/C++ compiler- it's basically GCC/G++ converted to DOS. I definitly see this project as the source of many a headache and blackhole for any school work in the future.

Fun day. Went to psychologist. Wrote Python code. Picked up brother from school. Ran over hair-dryer with 1992 Ford Explorer. Replaced battery in Ford Explorer. Fun fun fun.

This was MY birthday TOO! What an interesting day it seems to have been.
Thanks for sharing your stuff guys.
I remember sharing a pot-luck dinner with some friends that evening after running an Arts Festival in our little town all weekend.
Usually I'd have a BIG party on my birthday.
I didn't last year and it was kind of restful, actually.

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