Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "Jesus is like Elvis. Both were pretty cool guys, but their followers scare me."

• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• What do girls think about guys when they catch guys staring at their breasts, but the guy is actually trying to read her shirt?
• I used to like it, but it makes me sick to the stomach
• Looking like a pirate is fun but only having one eye annoys me
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• I'm happy but you don't like me
• I don't know why but I always love episodes without words. like just something about them makes me feel calm or something..
• Our obsessions almost killed me, but now here we are, talking like normal human beings
• She may be pretty and have more money than me but she doesn't write songs about you.
• Death arrived shortly thereafter, but we were both far too busy to bother with one another just yet
• Sex and death have both spat me out like spoiled milk for the same reason. I was not afraid.
• I would've taken an axe to it, but I'm pretty sure the dryad would have pulverized me
• The good guys and the bad guys were on the back of the boat and I swear I only turned my back for a MINUTE but when I came back, they'd killed Mozart.
• I don't think I realized what I had gotten myself into, but it seemed like the potential for fun and insanity were there in equal parts
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• speak to me, long-dead sage; tell me what your afternoons were like
• Poetry you found that you wrote when you were ten but secretly still like
• He Never Told Me My Eyes Were Like Diamonds
• I like the city, but the city doesn't like me
• The serpent was in the garden again, but there weren't any apples left in the tree, so I figured things were cool.
• They call you heartless, but you have a heart, and I love you for being ashamed to show it. You are ashamed of your flood, while others are ashamed of their ebb.
• They blew up the world, but what really pisses me off
• ships are safest in harbor, but they were made to sail
• You've Always Had a Hidden Agenda, but people were busy with other things
• But I Like You
• Santa's festive fear mongering wasn't going as well as he'd hoped, but the other Santa and I were enjoying the gingerbread.
• That's a valid point, but right now we're focusing on...
• You beat it in me, that part of you/But I'm gonna split us back in two
• Desperate guys who 'talk' me for no apparent reason
• I was me before being me was cool.
• there are people who are gone but wanted me to be happy
• Butterflies are passive aggressive and put their problems on the shelf, but they're beautiful
• 'C' may be for cookie, but that's not good enough for me, dammit!
• They are all pretty but fading.
• Pretty Butt (user)
• Bye Don, you were nothing but a waste of time
• We shook hands and pretended like it meant nothing
• This guy in the computer lab who looks like he should be a doctor
• We were both scared of the dark
• Some guy tried to buy drugs from me last night
• I could never draw but they made me an artist
• "But offstage things were falling apart..." is a registered trademark of VH1 Behind the Music
• Welcome to Canada; we're closed for the playoffs
• He comforted me when he thought I needed it, but never when I really did
• Boston sports fans and their teams: A brief but angsty perspective
• I feel like shit today, but I can always feel worse tomorrow
• The bastards hung me in the spring of '25, but I am still alive.
• but you should be right here, right next to me
• The bastards got me but they won't get everybody
• your fake name is not for everyone but good enough for me
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• She's smarter than me but she's also more quiet, therefore she has no personality which makes me feel better
• We're one, but we're not the same
• armed with nothing but their own vision
• We're both tops
• I've crossed lines of words and wire, and both have cut me deep
• Is that me shaking? Is that you shaking? Are we both shaking?
• one was giving me the eye but nothing came of it
• These guys are cool; and by cool, I mean totally sweet
• But what's stopping me from staring at the stars now?
• If we're both dead, it's not necrophilia anymore.
• I am afraid to breathe or shut my eyes but I do both.
• Excuse me while I kiss this guy
• Aw, Mom, ya know I'm not like other guys; I'm nervous and my socks are too loose
• There's a guy works down the chip shop swears he's Elvis
• Cool! Now hand me the sandwich Luke.
• They know me not by name, but numbers
• I can prove that Jesus was both human and divine
• Give me chastity and continency, but not yet
• Our hearts were hard, but they were warm
• Hot pursuit
• I note that she is pretty, but we are off into the city, my werewolf friend and I
• They don't realize they're talking about death but I can hear it behind their voices
• They were looking for God but found religion instead
• I told her I could read her mind, but she didn't believe me. I could tell.
• So many were frozen, but you we kept warm
• Girls possess me but they're never mine.
• Perhaps pain will stop me where good sense and virtue have failed
• You know to me she's but a fetish
• You can say the train isn't real but it's still going to sting like a son of a b
• Tell me a story about a burro, standing atop a mesa, surrounded by a flock of geese, being fed by a weathered old man wearing nothing but a Jimmy hat
• The fire behind their eyes died slowly and silently until nothing but the shells remained
• I tried to laugh but my photocells were cold from the night
• love me less, but, love me for a long time...!
• And then they came for me, but the bridge would not ignite.
• You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
• So then I tried staring into the abyss, but it got distracted by a weasel and ditched me
• when I am King, we will have no such things, but, my lads, if the old king my father were dead, we would be all kings.
• But we're leaving St. Francis in the trunk of the car
• There were a few moments you will not hear about, but they happened
• i wish i felt like teaching today, but i just want to be selfish
• it's like something big is happening right in front of us but we can't see it
• one kiss: bad for me, but i give in so easily. i'm weak.
• Maybe you were inherently complicated, maybe you've been complicated over the years, but know that you are complicated.
• When you get to the top, I know what it'll seem like. But there IS someone there. There IS someone there.
• it made me sick but kept me warm
• in this world there are no equals but some day you will surpass me
• we're all here to die. but if you think that's all it is, you still have the bag on your head.
• Nobody for me but you
• i might look like a grown person, but i'm just a tiny confused scientist
• But I'm a good person! Yeah great you wanna help me with this or what?
• There are many like it, but this one is mine
• Zephronias is unfriendly to new noders, like, sometimes but not always. Depends on several astronomical variables
• Explaining a joke is like dissecting a frog. You understand it better but the frog dies in the process.
• not like the shoe and not like the ring but just like the heart
• cool guy (user)
• we're cool
• The bees were cool
• it'd break my heart but if i knew you got away it'd give me peace of mind till the day i die
• Why I like this Joseph Lieberman guy
• Why guys care if their partner spits or swallows
• Jesus versus Elvis
• So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
• Three guys whose voices are like clear glass
• I Love Them But They Don't Love Me
• Things people put up their butts
• I may never be queen, but you will never break me
• he touched me then, but I forgot to feel
• It's not so much that I like him as a person God, but as a boy he's very handsome
• Every programmer is incompetent but me.
• I know that all the cannabis activists would like you to believe differently but
• There are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how
• Talking like a pirate is fun but annoys people
• Everything you ever wanted to know about theatre tech, but were afraid to ask
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• A kiss may not be the truth, but it is what we wish were true
• I would have tried, but Charlotte kept Charlotte in the world of Charlotte and she barely heard me
• Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex (But Were Afraid To Ask)
• You can play with my ex-girlfriend, but treat her like the lady that she is.
• You find yourself being chased not only by the bad guys, but also by what should be the good guys
• I don't know where he gets his words but I like them
• Due to the Incompetence of our novice author, our heroine, cahla, finds herself in the wilds of Djibouti; there is no denouement in sight, but the moonlight is pretty.
• Nobody Knows It But Me
• Jesus died for somebody's sins, but not mine
• It's like this train. It can't run anywhere but where its rails take it.
• I like electronic music, but I am not a raver.
• Like hating water, but living in the lowlands
• You say you love; but with a voice
• World, take care of me. You don't owe it to me, but I don't know any better.
• "Excuse me, but could you drop your large backpack somewhere else, please?" A (almost) christmas nodermeet in the East End
• Can't imagine why, but I feel like dancing
• War is hell but men like it
• I may be cold and calculating, but that doesn't make me a computer
• their eyes meet for the first time, but they saw each other's hearts
• There's someone in my head but it's not me
• I know it's boring to go on about it, it bores me to sleep, but what the hell, why doesn't it fade
• "Life" appears to be a zero-sum structure, but we're running the numbers again
• New York I Love You, But You're Bringing Me Down
• But beauteous fields lie just before me
• pretty, but
• But can you still cry like a child?
• As Guan Yu would surrender to the Han, but not to Cao Cao, I will surrender to you, but not to your desire to control me.
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• i remember reading this but i can't remember if i liked it or not
• I don't believe in God or the soul but these machines can make me cry
• curiosity killed the cat, but it never hurt me
• I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me
• like you're blind but still can see
• She might not need me. But then again she might.
• You don't know me, but someday you will
• I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I took an arrow to the knee
• We're not running out of electrons any time soon, but dreams are in short supply.
• Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me
• I may not have had enough of me but I've had enough of you
• Nah, these random encounters with beautiful strangers won't destroy me at all. But I guess I thought it'd be a good way to die at the time.
• But if life were only moments, then you'd never know you had one
• The Tesla Coil made me cry, but I got a free lunch out of it.
• 1991-96 were more fun years, but I'll likely get more accomplished in the year 2000 alone
• I swear I just came here for a sandwich, but do you remember me?
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• I'm beginning to think that nothing I think or say makes sense to anyone but me
• "This sandwich is great, but it could be better if it had tomatoes and also gave me super powers."
• Redemption is very much like vengeance. Redemption has more valor, and is more satisfying if you obtain it. But if you chase it blindly you can waste yourself completely.
• She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
• Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can make me think I deserved it.
• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• Maybe I'm naive but this type of website bugs me

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