Findings:

• Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
• The Old Man's Comforts and How He Gained Them
• I wanted to see how many times he wouldn't ask.
• I don't know where he gets his words but I like them
• I don't know what I don't know, so how do I know what to ask?
• How can you arrive anywhere if you don't take that first road trip?
• Of course they want to come here. Who doesn't? Besides the people from Los Angeles, but we don't speak of them.
• If I didn't ask, I'd never know (how much you hate me)
• Why don't we try to destroy tropical cyclones by nuking them?
• Goops and How to be Them
• I don't know who Amber is, but she's got a stalker
• Spikey the Werm may be a Werm, but he's got quite an imagination nonetheless!
• Dr. Bloodmoney or How We Got Along After the Bomb
• He thinks I don't, but I do
• He taught me how to smoke
• Don’t write love letters to women unless you are dating them
• You remember how to whistle don't you?
• Throw your hands (up) in the air, (and) wave them all around like you (just) don't care
• we've got a lot of time, or maybe we don't
• How Maria got herself a pussy
• How Quetzalcoatl Got His Groove Back
• The ones with their priorities straight don't know how to get what they want, and the ones who get what they want have messed up priorities.
• So says the preacher man, but... I don't go by what he says
• Lunch, two good men, books, how much I like them
• What Happened to Them at Surinam, and How Candide Became Acquainted with Martin
• Common Heroes and how to deal with them
• Friends who need you, and how not to deal with them
• Let's shoot Cupid, see how he likes it
• When life gives you lemons, suck on them. Seriously, lemons taste awesome.
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• They don't get it. Let them suffer.
• He don't know
• we never really fight, so I don't know how this is supposed to go
• Winners don't do drugs, they just sell them
• Don't ask don't tell
• How the chipmunk got its stripes
• How the Camel Got His Hump
• My soul is in a million pieces. I tried to collect most of them, but some are missing, and the ones I have don't fit together anymore. Feel free to take a piece or two.
• How the Fairy got in the Coke Machine
• Stand up for yourself, OR: How I got the shit kicked out of me
• How the Telegard Source got leaked to the world
• I will ask them all their dreams
• How to argue about something you don't know literally a single thing about
• How the Old Woman Took Care Of Candide, and How He Found the Object of His Love
• Grinding power supply fans and how to fix them
• Baltimore natives, and how to understand them
• Of King Sigmund's last battle, and of how he must yield up his sword again
• I don't have any secrets. Now ask me if I have any lies.
• How to approach a developer who may well be working and ask him a question
• Strange man makes permanent visit
• Words are how we see you. Use them well.
• Jobs that can drive you to the poorhouse, and how to avoid them
• So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
• How Eulenspiegel announced he wanted to fly
• The New Face of the BSOD: An Adventure in Password Recovery
• The best part about you is that you don't even know how great you are
• I'm changing the climate! Ask me how
• There are many things that I would like to say to you but I don't know how
• Your beliefs are your concern, just please don't let them creep into our secular argument
• Don't believe the florist when he tells you that the roses are free.
• Why Doesn't He Ask Me to Prom?
• I would kiss you, but I don't know how to kiss
• If you meet the Buddha on the road, ask him how far it is to the next gas station. *Then* kill him.
• Punks aren't lazy. They just don't got principles.
• You can put your boots in the oven, but that don't make them biscuits.
• He asks, anxious to hear the story
• What, we don't shoot them now?
• It Don't Mean a Thing (If It Ain't Got That Swing)
• I don't know why but I always love episodes without words. like just something about them makes me feel calm or something..
• Don't worry, I know how to let go.
• How the Whale Got His Throat
• How to flip a coin when you haven't got one
• How Pac-Man got his name
• Somehow it's all connected. I just don't know how.
• Don't try to make the moment last. You can ruin it that way. Just learn to savor it and, when the time comes, learn how to let it go.
• How Opal Mehta Got Kissed, Got Wild, and Got a Life
• How Hazelnut got torn a new arsehole
• got to be good looking cause he's so hard to see
• I don't tell her these things, and she doesn't ask
• How the Sea Mouse got its Spines
• Next time one of those tough kids asks you to smoke pot, tell them "MY GRASS IS FOR MOWING"
• Ask her if she's got an answer
• How can we face these dazzling things, I ask you?
• In this moment I'm focused on my own emotions. I don't care about how you feel. I can't.
• I know there are other fish in the sea but I don't want them
• How Candide Was Brought Up in a Magnificent Castle and How He Was Driven Thence
• A half-man, half-monstertruck ex-CIA vampire must save the world the only way he knows how: with ROCK
• That's Just How He Was
• "The Americans in their wisdom have taken the heads off the pictures, enlarged them and superimposed them with the heads of animals and then strung them up all over the walls of the interrogation room," he said
• The Lover Showeth How He Is Forsaken of Such as He Sometime Enjoyed
• No matter how wise an old sheep, he can't teach a fish how to polevault
• How to use chopsticks
• I will fucking REMOVE your writeups about Cloud Strife and how he's cool and mysterious and shit
• Hard disk vibrations and how you can stop them
• IP Addresses and How to Deal With Them
• How do ya like them apples?
• when you reflect that john now knows how he's going to die.
• GpBCT: proof that Bob wins on a countable union of sets if he's guaranteed a win on each one of them
• How to fit pants without trying them on
• Narcissists - How to cope with them
• Beautiful words are nonsense if you can't hear how you're saying them.
• How to Remove Your Bookmarks (all of them, and with Python)
• And I asked myself about the present: how wide it was, how deep it was, how much was mine to keep?
• How 'bout them transparent dangling carrots?
• He's not cute, as in good looking, but he's got a cute psychosis
• Why don't people remember how to use rotary phones?
• How to scare the Hell out of a Lexus driver, or: Don't take sharp corners at 50mph in the rain
• Please don't tell me how to do my job
• I don't know how to fall in love with a woman
• What they don't know can't hurt them
• If you don't want us to look at your breasts, don't shove them in our faces
• I Don't Need to Have Children, I Date Them
• Days go by like sweet summer breeze; I don't know I... can't feel them anymore
• Don't Go Out the Door
• I Don't Want What You Got Goin' On
• My crush asked if he could kiss me
• Badgers? We ain't got no badgers. We don't need no badgers. I don't have to show you any stinking badgers!
• How we sleep on the nights we don't make love
• A seething hatred for assholes, bullies and those that don't seem to mind them
• One of my IRC friends died and I don't know how to feel
• I don't know if these are good flowers or bad flowers, but I picked them for you
• Writers don't look for their big breaks. They write them.
• A lot of houses don't even have anyone to board them up.
• You don't know what you've got till it's gone
• I don't know how to smile
• Don't be afraid, you've just got your eyes closed
• they still come to me even though i don't come to them
• I Love Them But They Don't Love Me
• I don't know how to read science fiction
• i am a seedling. i don't even understand how much i have yet to learn.
• I don't know how the fuck you can sleep at night
• Don't interrupt an enemy when they're making a mistake
• How Uncle Henry Got Into Trouble
• Next time one of those tough kids asks you to cultivate bioethanol, tell them "MY CORN IS FOR EATING"
• He's got stacks and stacks of words that rhyme, describing what it is to lose
• How The Rhinoceros Got His Skin
• don't let them scare you
• we are learning how not to forget, but we still don't know what's true
• Don't ask
• How Stella Got Her Groove Back
• Life is like a strange, unpopular restaraunt filled with odd waiters who give you things you never asked for and don't always like.
• How the Chimney-Sweep Got the Ear of the Emperor
• edev: Writeuptype bugs, or how nate got stuck between two parentheses
• How I got over my homophobia or the reasons that I blame my grades on a gay man
• How Marsha Davis got her boyfriend
• Mr. Potato Head Sprouted. He got moldy. Now he's all dried up, but he's still up in the cabinet.
• How Six Men Got On in the World
• He asked for more flesh
• I should ask my barber where he gets his hair cut, then go there and slowly make my way up the chain
• Victor Hugo once got so mad he threw a baseball through a dog
• And he noticed my fingers / and asked me if I would play (e2poll)
• We've got all this beauty and just enough time to figure out how to destroy it.
• The Mother Tongue: English and How it Got That Way
• How I almost got shot all up full of holes
• How the American flag got raped
• The Tornado, or, how we almost all got killed.
• If you don't know how to make a mu, you have no business measuring quantities that small.
• How to avoid people whom you don't like talking to
• The Abridged Edition: She was to one side, he was to the other, an untested bridge between them
• As if he knew that words were how I kissed
• How many times has God twiddled his thumbs before he put vertebrates on the Earth?
• My life's got rags, my life's got riches. They've all been mixed together for so long it's hard to tell them apart.
• The Good Gardener (On How He Fell)
• How He Didn't Understand Her Whichever
• How Greg got the Prosperity Baby-Proofed
• How could anybody know how we got to be this way?
• questions to ask of friends and lovers
• Stories that you write as you read them
• Ask moJoe : Dear Jeered-at in Jerusalem
• Ask moJoe : Dear Spamtasic in Wallawalla
• I'm going to have to ask you to leave
• Using the chatterbox to ask for definitions
• Ask Me More Eeyore
• Before you ask a question
• On the cost of First Class postage
• When I asked Anna to marry me
• Questions I would ask my born-again sister, if we were still talking
• The first time I asked a girl to dance
• The Devil is just the Angel that asked for more
• You are groovy. No, I mean it. Ask a fish. Ask the moon.
• The Important Stuff (or, Has Nobody Really Asked This Yet?) (e2poll)
• I didn't ask if the glass was half full or half empty. I've always had enough to drink.

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