" is not a universal verb.
You didn't "download" IT
You may have "saved" the file
You may have "opened" the file
You may have accidentally done something right and "uploaded
" the file...
in which case I will soon be waiting 20 minutes for my IMPORTANT eMail while I'm forced to DOWNLOAD your fucking chain letter
full of poorly animated cherub
s and corrupted .wav
files of Wind Beneath My Wings
But you can not use "download" as a synonym
for "it's finished, now what do I click on?"
You best not ask me to fix your computer
And you can not ask me, "Where did it download to?"
Well, you CAN ask me these things
but it will do you no good,
like buying the MSN
package from Best Buy
did you no good
because I will not fix your computer
I have many duties as "the cripple"
all of them are self assigned
I don't care what great computer wizardry the fucking cripple on TV pulled off
I have no desire to fix your computer
You don't need to tell me all the steps you go through while "trying to download the internet
I couldn't begin to give a fuck
I don't want you "in virtual space"
Don't ask me, "which internet do you subscribe to?"
Even when you're confined to AOL your stupidity suffocates me
You waste precious bandwidth with every dancing hamster you view
You make message boards more useless with every "me too!" you type
You choke my eMail with every careless click of the "FWD" button
It is beneficial to me that you aren't on-line
So, no, I will not fix your computer
I like you broken