WARNING! INSANE SPOILERS! NEVER RUB ANOTHER MAN'S RHUBARB!


Title: Bipolar Disorder
Release Date: December 2001
Writers: Chuck Dixon and Scott Beatty
Penciller: Darryl Banks
Inker: Wayne Faucher
JLA Members: Superman, Batman, Green Lantern, the Flash, Wonder Woman, Plastic Man, and the Martian Manhunter.
Bad Guys: Dr. Polaris.
Cameos: The Joker, Dr. Light, Captain Nazi, King, Ten, Ace, Houngan, King Shark, Dervish.

So what happens?
A little backstory: DC's latest crossover event is called the Last Laugh. The Joker believes he has a terminal brain tumor and has decided to leave his mark upon the world. Using his knowledge of chemistry, he's exposed a huge number of supervillains to his Joker Venom, creating a small army of pasty-skinned, green-haired, grinning, giggling homicidal maniacs. Most of 'em are small-timers, contenting themselves to defacing national monuments and killing Cub Scouts for laughs, and are taken down by various solo heroes. But when you get a Jokerized villain who could destroy the planet all by himself, you gotta call in the Big Guns...

Even under the best of circumstances, Dr. Polaris is crazy. The magnetic supervillain is one of the most powerful beings on earth, but his multiple personalities often leave him warring with himself, instead of the superheroes. But now that he's been Jokerized, all of his personalities are raving lunatics, and he's flying down to Antarctica so he can absorb all of the South Pole's electromagnetic energy. That basically turns him into the South Pole, giving him the ability to shift the Earth's axis just by going for a walk. Weather starts to get wacky, the Southern Lights are sighted on the wrong side of the equator, and the JLA swings into action, only to have Polaris crash their jet in the middle of the Antarctic.

After that, everyone starts making fairly dumb decisions for a while. Must be magnetic waves messing with brain chemistry or something. They let Plastic Man freeze solid (Hey, we'll let th' guy who shatters when frozen turn into a popsicle. It'll be funny. Hyuk!), then they let Green Lantern decide how to deal with Polaris (Hit him fast and hit him very, very hard) instead of Batman (Plan this out ahead). So of course, Polaris stomps 'em, magnetically electroshocking Batman and Wonder Woman, magnetizing Martian Manhunter's blood and Green Lantern's ring, and socking Superman with a few thousand tons of derelict Antarctic shipwrecks. Flash has to race ahead of the cloud of metal debris that Polaris sends after him but is able to get everyone far enough away from Polaris to keep them safe. But the problem remains: Polaris has an effective counter for everyone in the JLA, because all of them have at least trace amounts of metal in their bloodstreams...all except for one frozen popsicle...

So Martian Manhunter hurls the still-frozen Plastic Man at Dr. Polaris' position, and Superman and Green Lantern use heat vision and a power ring-generated laser cannon to melt Plas again. Plastic Man quickly wraps Polaris up and re-enacts Three Stooges routines on him 'til he's good and woozy, then lets Wonder Woman punch his lights out.

And that's pretty much the end of it. Superman, Martian Manhunter, and Plastic Man stay at the South Pole to help undo the Jokerization and drain Polaris of his excess electromagnetic energy, and Batman teleports back to Gotham City on a teleport pad he apparently buried in Antarctica just in case he ever needed one there. Better check your kitchen pantry; Batman may have built a teleport pad there just in case he ever runs out of Froot Loops...

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