I came to school in my underwear. That's not too weird, but I was wearing Batman panties and I had on a gigantic hockey jersey and on the back it said Vladimir Lenin. All right! I was on a Russian hockey team.

There is a new grade at my school, the 15th grade, for those pursuing higher education, an engineering grade. And there were voting polls and such. And people were voting for me and my running mate, John Madison?

Then I had to go to academic team practice and everyone was playing soccer and when you got the ball, you had to answer a question. Heather or Debra, two teammates, got the ball and answered something about Pakastani rugs and Ben yelled out, "That's what they get for not living in Iceland like Bjork with 15 mountains!" So, angry at me, they kick me the bal, but it hits me so hard that I have to go to the hospital to get an artificial arm. And I get kicked off the team and my captain laughs at me and says, "NO CRIPPLED RETARDS!" And I'm crying until a ball hits me again and knocks off my artificial limb and I am allowed to play again.