Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "This is a lie. I was in Paris at the time, but I was drunk in some brothel for most of the visit. I did, however, get to ride in a La Mancelle a few years later in what is probably the first unreported case of grand theft auto."

• She probably thought your first language was English; your real first language was Joyce
• Some time when I was a teenager
• (because this was always subconsciously the inspiration, even if I did not know it at the time, and I only realised it just now)
• that pain was something I needed, and probably did to myself
• The time they fantasize about was built on a lie
• I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
• She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
• This book was stolen from the Harvard College Library. It was later recovered. The thief was sentenced to two years at hard labor.
• The first time I saw him was I emit tsal ehT
• relatedly somehow, there was a point a few years ago when I learned how to terrify
• The first time I knew I was different
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
• Several thousand years later and the angel was still as boring as sin
• Once upon a time there was an ocean but now there is a mountain range.
• Jesus was a reactionary reformer, just like Martin Luther in later years.
• Last time I checked, Buddha was not just some lameass winamp skin for Jesus
• Once upon a time there was light in my life, but now there's only love in the dark
• the fire burned and burned; it was so great and now so much time has passed and the fire is still burning, but it requires attendance
• Grand Theft Auto
• His collection of substances that should not exist was stolen. The thieves then killed themselves 1000 times over.
• Before Time Was
• It wasn't until later, when I was washing the blood off my hands, I even knew they were dead
• When I was five years old, I knew I was going to die
• I was put on hold for time to gnaw me raw.
• The virgin was looking apprehensive about the whole ordeal, but for the right amount of cash anyone will take on a horse
• There was a lot of blood, but the boys needed it
• Grand Theft Auto 2
• Arrested for Grand Theft Auto
• Everything Stalin did was legal
• Why I didn't get my driver's license until I was 18
• I bought an orange, but it was a grapefruit
• Grand Theft Auto III
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• When I was 21, he was building a Time Machine
• Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
• Grand Theft Auto: London 1969
• It was too late by the time the robots came and I couldn't, I just couldn't
• I did not need it. I was strong. I was steady. I knew what I was doing.
• Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas
• This essay was due a year ago
• When I was little my mother told me not to sit close to the T.V., so when I was six I did.
• there was a time when you couldn't just learn things instantly
• Remember the first time you heard your parents get really scared?
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• The sound was starting to get stuck in my head like "It's a Small World"
• The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
• I was burned and bleeding, but the galaxy still spun on
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• My first and last attempt at a one night stand was raided by the police
• She was most amazed by the obvious, like January and the fact that I could not possibly keep her.
• Last time I was in Chicago I broke my ass
• If all you picked up tonight was this node title, it's time you went to a Brit nodermeet
• That time I was almost killed by scary cult children
• where was your heart when we needed it most?
• My very first mentor was a heroin junkie
• I was a teenage time traveling combat waitress
• Auto grand theft (user)
• someday, when she will think back upon the time when she was as yet undishonored
• There was a time when I got lost wherever I went.
• Last year was always better
• Why, Martha, for the longest time there was no railway station in Slough!
• The class valedictorian was still tripping balls when he was bailed out in time to give the commencement speech at graduation
• I worked at summer camp, and all I got was this lousy case of gangrene
• That Was The Year That Was
• In the end it did not matter. The ocean was still there.
• It was 30 years ago today, Miyamoto taught the kids to play... (e2poll)
• Where was her angel all those times the sky clouded over
• Why almost every node was written in the year 2000
• Everything Hitler did was legal
• I lived in interesting times, came to the attention of those in power, and found what I was looking for.
• 1991-96 were more fun years, but I'll likely get more accomplished in the year 2000 alone
• Cain was the first technologist
• the desert was once alive, but I don't remember it
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• After all, the Bible says Jesus' first miraculous sign was to make 180 gallons of wine for a party!
• The first iron-on transfer I made myself was controversial
• Hot pursuit
• Getting wet in La Habana on New Year's eve
• It did not get nicer, but it sure got a hell of a lot more honest
• I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
• The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• How Gudrun cast herself into the Sea, but was brought ashore again
• Oxygen was the world's first pollutant
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• The serpent was in the garden again, but there weren't any apples left in the tree, so I figured things were cool.
• She was feminine in the most displaced sense I had ever seen, a known quality refracted through stained glass windows.
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• A long time ago, under the shady tree in my yard, I was dead
• There was a time when I was a better person
• This is the time. The time was now. And now is then. This was the time.
• /but what was the question?
• Grand Theft Auto IV
• Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few
• grand theft auto sandreas cheats
• Grand Theft Auto Advance
• Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories
• Grand Theft Auto: Vice City Stories
• Grand Theft Auto series
• Fruit cut from the vine, forgot and left to rot, long before it was time
• Seriously, though, who the hell did I think I was going to become?
• for a long time i was afraid i would forget; now i'm afraid i might not
• the last time I clobbered a human soul it was over a red-nosed girl and a schoolbook in County Derry
• unfortunately, his entire corpus was composed in English, and so has been lost to the ravages of time
• I spent one year in love and all I got was this lousy T-Shirt.
• At that time I was taken up with alchemy
• What did people use as incidental music before Moby was invented?
• That Time Zeph Was A Criminal
• i always want to go back. but i don't know if it's time yet. i have some things i have to do.
• Was that real, or did I dream it?
• it was just as if she held her breath for 82 years
• All you ever did was let it happen
• She was the cutest necromancer I ever did see
• If all you did was node, your writeups wouldn't be very interesting, would they?
• Looks like 1984 was only n years off
• did i really change the way you think about everything? was it the chemicals in your brain?
• It was the year 2000. Nobody knew what was coming.
• I did not miss what my body did not remember, until it was reminded
• There was just the magic I'd brought and laid there over the years, piled up in the corners like twinkling dust bunnies
• I was very, very drunk
• We did not know it was a war
• it was years before they met again, by chance
• When I was ten years old
• Noding for Numbers sure was silly, but it sure is better than Dada Fascism
• I shaved my legs the other day for the first time in 4 years
• It all turned out all right but there was so much pain along the way
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• I appreciate your concern for others, but I need to get all my ducks in a row first.
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• I was so cool, that first afternoon
• She really does want to clap along, but at the same time she doesn't want to let the bird get out.
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• I don't get many things right the first time
• Adam really was the first man
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• When I was a kid, I wanted to get tuberculosis
• I got the feeling the Fairy Council was mad at me when the president knocked over her coffee to get a better grip on my neck
• The flowers smiled, but she was gone
• You thought the silent treatment was as cold as it could get
• their eyes meet for the first time, but they saw each other's hearts
• strange and too short but I was lonely
• I never even went to Las Vegas, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt
• He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
• why I do have to get so deep with people all the time just to gently let them down 2 weeks later
• Strange man makes permanent visit
• I died for Beauty -- but was scarce
• Here lies one whose name was writ in water
• I think I was watching the most beautiful thing I have ever seen
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• Her innocence fell. She kicked at it some, frowned, and left it there because it was beautiful.
• The most wonderful time of the year
• Most adults forget what it was like to be a child once they hit a certain age
• some say he was never here at all
• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• Today was some bullshit.
• every secret thing was made by some one
• I was shaking, but not from the cold
• There was silence in my heart, but you found a way to break it.
• I was in heaven, I was in hell. Believed in niether but feared them as well.
• She was locked in time
• some people lie but they're looking for magic
• one was giving me the eye but nothing came of it
• but fuck, it was Sunday and the church bells hadn't even called the faithful
• Nostalgic for a time that I never experienced and for a person I never was
• Dawn was a lucky time to give birth
• My soul is in a million pieces. I tried to collect most of them, but some are missing, and the ones I have don't fit together anymore. Feel free to take a piece or two.
• I never wanted to burn any bridges. But I did want to light some fires.
• There was a time before
• we went to the stars, but all we found was ourselves
• The real reason pi was never calculated to a high precision in ancient times
• When I Was Born for the 7th Time
• It was hormones, it was hormones, but it was valid
• he was alive, and some of the other people, they were carbon copies
• Like most of my dreams, that one was licensed for commercial use
• For a few more precious seconds, the body I was born with was still in one piece
• I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
• When I was young Time had no wings
• i thought i was special, but it was you
• The Box Said 'Do NOT Open" But The Seal Was Already Broken
• It was a dream. But it wasn't a dream.
• Was There a Time
• God was in the west too, at one time.
• I was a father for a few days

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