So, I've never done a daylog or anything. Not that I don't think my life is interesting - far from it. No, I just don't see why anyone else would find it interesting. Besides, I'm a lazy sod.

But damn. This you gotta hear about.

So my three other housemates and I are living in some apartment thing. Lots of bare redstone walls and hanging tapestries, hewn wooden furniture - all austerity and Hall of the Mountain King kinda stuff. Nothing at all like our suburban two story fibre-board student digs.

Landlord shows up. He's the same landlord as we have now, but instead of being a slightly retarded overweight electrician, he is thin, quiet, creepy, pale, and wearing a cape. He tells us in a very sibilant voice that we have to be out of the apartment within half an hour, because, "the time has come, and we need the building." He threatens us with terribly unpleasant, but sufficiently vague, repercussions should we fail to comply.

But we know he needs to give us two weeks notice, so like hell we're gonna move out. Next thing we know, the whole building starts shaking, and we look out the window to see that the whole building is moving slowly along the road. We realise they are re-arranging the city into some dark and evil glyph.

So we all run downstairs into the street. I see the landlord fleeing around a corner and chase him. I follow him a few blocks away to a deli that seems to be at the heart of this evil symbol. Through the window, I watch as he meets John Travolta, who is wearing a cape, has fangs, and otherwise looks very much like his character in Battlefield Earth. Travolta is ordering something very mysterious. They start discussing the progress of their dark and evil plan.

I realise what's going on - the Vampire Scientologists are taking over the city. But I have an advantage.

I know their secret.

I wait just around the corner of the deli door. As Travolta leaves, I lunge for him. But his vampire reflexes are too quick for me. He starts running away, and ducks into a little alley. I chase him to the mouth of the alley, and stop. "I know who you are!" I shout. "And I know what you're doing!"

With a soul-chilling scream, the darkness in front of me re-arranges itself into Travolta's spectral figure. "I know who you are - John Travolta!" I smugly say. "I could destroy you. You'll never work again, except with your scientologist freaks."

"What do you want," he asks me.

"All I want is for you to sign over the deed to our building to us. And find some other building for your evil map."

He hisses at me, as I reveal that I know the full extent of his plan. He tries to hurt me, but, protected by my certainty, I realise how he is trying to hurt me, and somehow turn it back against him. He relents.

He gave us the building. And I woke up.

My dreams are usually about sex, dammit.

Death doesn't have to be about physical death. It seems my dreams lately have been centered around death. Everything from a plant to a bug to a person.

A friend of mine died last month, and perhaps that facilitated the fears, but I'm not one to be overly shaken up over the loss of life.

Last night it was the death of a puzzle. I have this 3-D puzzle of the New York City skyline that I recently completed. In the dream, it got destroyed by a rogue wind blowing through my room.

Perhaps it's nothing, but I'd really like to have a dream about something wonderful happening. The constant dying of things in my sub-conscience is starting to bring me down a wee bit.

I had this odd dream last night that doubled as an epiphany of sorts, I guess. I was flying out of Logan Airport, as I have done many times before, and for some reason I was taking an airplane to Saudi Arabia. I remember being on the plane with my friend, but she never spoke to me, she just went up ahead to first class, leaving me pretty much alone. I was in the middle of seven consecutive empty rows. There were people behind me and people in front of me, but no one close to me. And for some reason they were showing Conan O'Brien on the televisions and the foldout trays were made of this mesh like metal. Anyways, I think I fell asleep during my dream, only to be woken up by an American flight attendant who told me that I was in the wrong seat and that I would be arrested as soon as I reached the ground. She said I should consider contacting the American embassy.

I'm not one for dream interpretation, I just think dreams are random stuff from your day mixed up together, but I think it provided me with something that I've seen in dreams before: a humanization of whatever subject I was studying. I've been reading up on the House of Saud lately, and I attribute the fruition of my dream to this, and the fact that, thanks to my mass consumption of violent culture, I've become immune to the reports of human rights violations there. Stories of arms being cut off and schoolgirls burned alive in buildings didn’t really have an effect on me anymore. But me being arrested for moving up to first class on an airplane and being thrown into jail, that appealed to my materialistic mind right away. Whether this was a message or a slap in the face from my benevolent God, urging me to see the humanity in my research or just a psychological happenstance that amounts to little more than brain indigestion, I don’t know. But I did wake up in a cold sweat, if that counts for anything.

 I dunno what this was about... an Inuyasha-Pokémon crossover? Kinda odd, too... Here it goes, hope you don't die reading this. Also, I don't remember when this dream happened...

 Okay, Miroku enters this mist of blood, alone, with no idea why, and he gets attacked by Sesshomaru. What? I thought he was after Inuyasha...? Then, they're underwater, and both hear a train coming. They shrug it off, and continue fighting. Miroku gets slammed into a rear train car... huh? A train car upside-down in the water? Can it get any weirder? It does. Brock rides in and runs over Sesshomaru in a train. He and Ash get out, and Ash decides that Shippo (who is now here) is a pokémon and tries to catch him--it works.

 Suddenly, I'm at a carnival... I step up to a sideshow. I pay, and go into this dark room. Lights flash everywhere. It interests me. Until I start thinking how it looks like a rave, and that's when hypodermic needles come down from the ceiling... uh-oh... phew. Stopped just in time. I yell at the carnival's manager about this.

 Back to the group. Our heroes are walking up a snowy mountain, still with the mist. "Hwaaa! The ground's breaking!" shouts Brock, as a pit forms beneath him! He reaches for something--Shippo's tail. Which cannot pull him up. Before they fall, Brock entrusts Togepi to Ash.

 The top of the mountain at last! The red fog is gone... and Misty is there. "Hi, guys! If you want the Dragonballs, you'll have to sneak into God's head." (Whaaaaaa...?) "No problem, Misty. Can you hold off the orcish army heading this way?" Ash replies. "Sure I can! I'm doing it to help you, Ash!" So, they sit and think--don't have long before the orcs invade Rohan... got it! Sneak into God's skin pores! They approach his head, which is all there is. He also has a lot of pimples for a deity...

 Can Ash make it? There! Finally in! Now to collect the Dragonballs... "Ash! I can't hold them off! Look out!" Misty cries. Miroku summons his wind tunnel, which absorbs just about everything but the orcs. Of course, the orcs cannot get past Ash's newest Pokémon; Giffupoffop! The clown riding a rubber ducky charges out of the Pokéball and at the orcs, blasting them into oblivion. Misty gets into the giant head and says, "All right, Ash! Huh? Is that Togepi? I thought I left it with Brock..." "Brock... didn't... make it..." Ash burst into song.

How could death claim my love,
Who I love more than the mooooon
I'd give all my Pokémon,
For Brock to retuuuuuurn.
Oh Brock,
I love you more than the mooooooooooon!
You don't need girls,
as long as you have me...

Make it stop! Make it stop!! Finally woke up... Take that, dream analysis!

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