(With apologies to Jethro Tull)

Standing in a store aisle
Scanning bottles with jaundiced eye
Thirst's gumming up your throat
But spending cash on water gets your goat
Hey Aquafina!

You see it's made by Pepsico;
Corporate America always gets you low.
Hey Aquafina!
Your sister said they're draining Thailand
making filters from old socks and sand.
Hey Aquafina!

But you're feeling so thirsty,
so you bend to grab a bottle
you find it's cool and tempting
in your hand.

The plastic label's blue like honesty
and the text is quite impressive:
local waters put through HydRO-7 purification
sounds like the best in all the land.

Low in salt, chloride, metals,
it's treated with active carbon,
reverse osmosis and ultraviolet,
this water's sounding grand!
Hey Aquafina!

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