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Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "/uIf my roommate doesn't keep his hands off my shit, I'm gonna fuck him upu"

• If my roommate doesn't keep his hands off my shit, I'm gonna fuck him up
• fuck it, I love you even if I'm gonna feel like shit
• a bit of ash in his face keeps him warm
• I'm the only person who'd ever told him to his face he was beautiful.
• The voting system doesn't work because I'm drunk and that fucks it up
• Just because I'm nice to her doesn't mean I want to fuck her
• Fuck this; I'm having butter
• A guitar is easy in his hands / so is an airplane / so is a pen
• I'm Gonna Git You Sucka
• I'm Gonna Ride That Southern Railway Line
• Ain't what I'm gonna be, ain't what I wanna be, but lord thank you I ain't what I used to be.
• Then I poked him in his sunburn
• I'm angry, and tired, and sad, and I just don't want to deal with it right now, so fuck off
• His hand speaks a foreign language to her ribs.
• Theories about the future that make you think "Holy shit, I'm scared!"
• I'm too old for this shit
• Bloody hell... I'm gonna die to Boney M
• Is it fair for him to love me when she craves his touch?
• His mother is slowly killing him.
• I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)
• keep an eye on things while i'm gone
• I'm not HIS sister; he's MY brother
• I'm not a dyke just 'cause I shaved my head, but if it keeps certain people away, fuckin' A right on
• He Died with a Felafel in His Hand
• The shit that gets carried out in His name
• A mace to the face keeps every man in his place
• She doesn't know what he sees, but sometimes it makes his face beautiful
• So I'm wrestling with the demoness while the priest is trying not to soil his vestments, and Faust is just sitting there like an idiot
• Just because a man is nice to pretty girls, it doesn't make him a nice man
• One more look at the ghost before I'm gonna make it leave
• why is the great man great? he keeps on running through a world of his own.
• I'm so worldly, I shit globes
• Heineken? Fuck that shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon!
• fuck you I'm an anteater
• Oh Shit. How can I take him home to Mother?
• What doesn't kill you can only fuck you up for a really, really long time
• Fuck you, I'm a Hindu
• You Should Never Have Asked Him About His Job!
• Just because I say Happy Hanukkah doesn't mean I'm Jewish
• And while the angel and the succubus are arguing, I'm trying to make sure Faust doesn't stop breathing
• So while Faust is busy trying to wipe the blood off his face and Shorty's trying to claw his eyes out, I mosey away and try my hand at storming the castle
• How Candide Found His Old Master Pangloss Again and What Happened to Him
• Someone has writer's block but I don't know if I'm him right now
• Shit, it talks; I'm out of here
• Sparkling like a star in his hand, melting like a snowflake
• Why for you kick my dog and call him fuck off?
• Of course I refused, afraid of what his hands might feel like
• It’s in his name and his clothes and his hands and his lips
• I knew enough about him to know his name and what kind of snowball he could make
• Point-Counterpoint: Just because I'm gay and you're a guy doesn't mean I want you
• My Shit's Fucked Up
• Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and start slitting throats
• That man has writer's block but I don't know if I'm him right now
• I'm talking about the kind of love that keeps you alive.
• We're gonna find the bastard and "reward" him.
• I'm not sharing him
• a constant, low wind trembles through him, catching his words and sending them out into the world
• I'm Gonna Watch You Sleep
• Just because she's nice to you doesn't mean she wants to fuck you
• Fuck me if I'm wrong
• I'm a Chicken-Hawk, and I'm gonna eat me some chickens
• keep your hands up
• Any man can handle adversity. If you want to test his character, give him power.
• The Man Felt an Iron Hand Grasp Him by the Hair, at the Nape. Not One Hand, a Hundred Hands Seized Him, Each by the Hair, and Tore Him Head to Foot, the Way You Tear Up a Sheet of Paper, Into Hundreds of Little Pieces
• His mind went blank against the flesh next to him
• Goddamnit, man, it's like this shit knows what I'm fucking thinking
• I'm Stalking Him Electronically
• Just because I'm black doesn't mean I can rap
• On the one hand my life is in danger, but on the other hand, I'm getting really stoned
• I'm gonna be sad and then I want you to make me laugh
• his whole life, like a thundercloud, out in front of him
• When he was five, his father made him murder his imaginary friend.
• Keep quiet, cause I'm hearing your words hot on the side of my neck.
• Fuck you I'm going to write poetry about your city
• If You See God First Tell Him Shit Got Worse
• Just because I like ballet it doesn't mean I'm a poof
• Well if it's gonna be THAT kinda party, then I'm gonna stick my dick in the mashed potatoes!
• Hands off, I'm special
• He said I'm better off without you, 'til I showed him my tattoo
• I'm living my life vicariously through my roommate
• What the fuck is this shit?
• As long as you keep looking for love, it ain't gonna find you.
• I need to hold your hand. I'm getting numb.
• To Him the law is everything. Even today, lawyers are His favorites.
• The guy who may as well already be dead and therefore doesn't care about the consequences of his actions and is able to move with perfect freedom for the remainder of what will likely be a tragically short life
• Jesus doesn't care if you say the word "fuck"
• YHWH declares that the substitution of LOVE with FUCK is punishable by AIDS; man responds by covering his member with plastic
• I'm sure gonna miss those brain cells
• Adam Smith and His Amazing Invisible Hand
• To me he is a daisy and I keep trying to count his petals
• Holy shit, you mean I'm not invisible?
• I'm gonna make you come tonight
• keep an eye on the horizon and a hand on your dagger
• Bukowski stands alone, the bar bell's hammer in his hand
• Why would a god let so many of his "flock" stray?
• The Ass and His Shadow
• Johnny Got His Gun
• And then I broke his nose
• And in His Brave Court
• He flops over and bonks his head
• The monk and his cat
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• His Majesty The King's Guard
• no beer, so Henry orders a double espresso during his parole appointment
• England expects that every man will do his duty
• His love was enormous; it cleared rooms that desperately wanted to be full.
• Synge and the Ireland of his Time: VI
• His name came up like a match on wooden me
• The walls of his apartment
• Man is but the imprint of his native landscape
• GOD EMPEROR OF DUNE DESIRES TO MATE WITH HIS BENE GESSERIT CONCUBINE
• In his house in Wonderland, dead Totoro lies dreaming.
• I'm
• Damn, I'm good.
• Damn it, I'm a Satan Worshipper
• I'm my own Grandpaw
• Look at me mammy I'm dancin I'm dancin
• I'm a decent guy's worst nightmare
• OK, so I'm a fuckup, and it's Tuesday
• I'm probably the best lover I'll ever have
• Stop saying "religion" when you mean "a particular religion about which I'm bitter"
• I'm not doing it just to be weird
• You nature lover / you country punk / you bowl me over / I'm not that drunk
• I'm In Love With Massachusetts ( ... drive on by ... ) (document)
• I'm not a doctor, but I play one on TV
• I'm Thinking Tonight of My Blue Eyes
• HEY im cool (user)
• Not now, Ma! I'm busy noding! (e2poll)
• I'm Rudy Giuliani! I was mayor of New York on 9/11! I Should Be The President!
• John McCain is a Butthead; I'm Barack Obama and I approve this message
• I'm always breathless when you call
• I think I'm finally ready for an everything2 account
• Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head
• Keep doing it, but don't call it that
• How to keep a Siamese Fighting Fish happy
• Lifted or The Story is in the Soil Keep Your Ear to the Ground
• We Should Keep This Secret
• The song that doesn't end
• Love does not keep promises
• My Swedish vibrator doesn't have Linux drivers!
• Keep Calm and Carry On
• Donald Duck was banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants
• I, Roommate (user)
• The endless blue sky is not big enough to hold her memories, so it doesn't
• Eat well, shit strongly, and you shall have no fear of death!
• It doesn't matter whether Hitler was an Atheist or a Christian
• le shit
• Fuck like crazed weasels
• talking shit about a pretty sunset
• Fuck what other people think
• Fuck you and the horse you rode in on
• If you really care about someone, do not tell her to fuck off
• fuck you, migraine
• Holy Fuck
• What's she gonna look like with a chimney on her?
• Hands
• eight hands around
• hands (user)
• Why Vampire Hunter D's hand ruins the entire movie
• alien hand syndrome
• Komm, Gib Mir Deine Hand
• left hand rule
• How to give a hand massage
• All I could remember in the morning is that maybe there were wishing hands involved
• How to cut a deck of cards with one hand
• Left Hand Solution
• A hand making promises
• Hand them a straw, and they'll suck the life out of you.
• cold hands
• You want that I should rough him up?
• Praise the Lord! Ye Heavens, Adore Him
• Atli bids the Giukings to him
• I never heard him say "I love you"
• Play him off, Keyboard Cat
• If you were team captain in a pick-up game of baseball and had Jesus Christ on your team, what position would you play him?
• Bless his Heart

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