Long day. Worked for eight hours. Took a nap during my lunch break instead of eating. Pfaltzgraff wasn't too busy today, but still much busier than any other day of the week. I made a big goal for myself; I was going to make sure the ceramic turkey candle holders in the Thanksgiving section stayed completely stocked throughout the day. There's only room for nine of them to go out at once, so I cleared a shelf and put the bright orange $1.49 clearance sticker on each turkey. They are extremely ugly things, and yet still somewhat cute in a dorky sort of way. I wouldn't mind owning one.

I watched that Deuce Bigalow movie with my boyfriend and his brother. It was absolutely hilarious. They kept rewinding it to the courtroom scene where some anonymous person yells out "That's a HUGE bitch!" when Tina has the stand. They rolled on the floor laughing for quite some time. I stole the remote and turned it off. You can only take so much of the same line being said over and over again, no matter how funny it might be.

I am sick. My mom gave me her cold, somehow, and now talking, breathing, eating, and doing nothing is quite painful. Not to mention coughing. I am trying to ignore that tickle in my throat at this very moment. The only peace I have is sleep.

I just heard the news. The daughter of a friend of my mother's, Crystal, is in the hospital for Anoreixa Nervosa. She has been, off and on, since she was fourteen. Well, she's almost nineteen now. I've never met her, but I've talked to her on the phone and written letters for quite awhile, trying to encourage her to tough it out and try hard. Then she was sent to The University of Iowa Hospital in Iowa City, IA. That's the last place I was committed too before recovery. Crystal's mom doesn't know what to do anymore. They have spent a fortune on treatment, and Crystal just keeps getting worse. But they can't let her die.

The parents just called my mother and told her Crystal wants me to fly to Iowa and visit her. Of course I'll go, for her sake. But I don't know how to feel or what to think. I spent five months of my life locked in that institution, and now I have to go back? The day I was discharged, I swore never to return. But Crystal asked me to come. I can't say no for selfish reasons. Can I? I don't know what to do. If I go, Crystal will be so happy. But I will be breaking a promise made to myself and facing a past I would do anything to forget. What do I do?