You know how in the school French classes (High School or College) they never taught you any useful swear words? Well, I visited Paris recently and found a great way to learn all of the coloful ways in which the French people hurl insults at each other.

1. From anywhere in Paris, hail a taxi.
2. Ask the driver to take you to somewhere about 20 minutes away.

While attempting to either negotiate the insane Paris traffic (if you caught your taxi during the day) or drive drunk (if you caught your taxi late at night) the driver will regail you with a constant stream of French profanities. These are usually directed at other drivers.

If your driver uses the same word over and over again, such as "merde, merde, merde", simply say to him "You know, in the United States we drive much, much better than these smelly Parisians." You will now get to hear a bunch of swear words directed at you.