I cross a sunny lawn and approach a patio where tens of young men wearing only thong
s lounge suggestive
ly across the cool marble. Some wear laurels, with classical Greek implication
s, and all are homosexual, each intertwine
d with the other. Among them is my friend D---.
An older man
sits in a chair above all this young flesh, watching. He's a professor, these are his students. And he's being sensationalistically interrogated by a television news
crew. The female interviewer is outraged by the spectacle
of sex and even, considering the age gap between professor and students, pedophilia
. The professor states that the project/display/orgy
in question had been his students' idea.
I'm watching the news crew from a distance, annoyed by their uninformed coverage. The reporter is very small, the size of a Lego
figurine. I consult a stuffed baby doll
on whether there would be any repurcussions if I killed the reporter. Lego figurines don't shed any blood
, and I reason that this is the only consideration differentiating between destruction
. The baby doll agrees. So I place the Lego reporter in front of the news van. She's run over and crushed.
by the destruction, I wonder how small and unbiological an otherwise animate object has to be in order for me to be allowed to torture
it with impunity
. My mind's eye sees a bleeding Raggedy Ann
, some organs, and a pair of butcher knives
The baby doll and I are sitting on the top of a bunk bed, and I'm trying to construct an alliance
. He has big, bright eyes
and sharp little teeth
and I'm thinking he'll be neccessary protection in this brutal doll world
. I'm explaining to him
If someone tries to hurt you, I'll protect you. And if someone tries to kill me..?"
"I'll help them," he coo
s. He looks like my littlest brother minus 6 years.
I'm terrified, wondering how long I'm safe. So I push the baby doll off the bed. He grabs the blanket which has draped from the bed onto the floor and pulls himself back up to where I am, like a pirate
climbing the rigging
of a ship. I know I'm much bigger than he is but it's still a struggle
for me to push him away and he's going to bite my arm...