The subscribers to a.p.t.e believe that the world would be a better place if it was completely covered in nice, smooth, shiny Asphalt; a single testament to the glory of mankind. In order to achieve this goal, Pavers live by The Creed and follow the Plan.

Why pave and become a driver? Just imagine. A nice cold Beer in one hand, a hearty Cheeseburger in the other, driving at Mach 1 across the globe in your custom built Hypercar, while all those that you hate dwell in The Pits tm, Hydroponic Cow Farms and Plutonium Mines below the surface, dedicated to making your life easy. Drivers will have reached cultural, social and philosophical nirvana. Drivers are free and not tied to the narrow minded dogma of the Plan.


The Plan is only a plan to convert the human race to its highest form - Drivers. Driver have true power over their environment, a kind of Jedi, if you will. Cheeseburgers and Beer are merely metaphors for the purpose of enslaving the weak of mind. To illustrate my point, I quote from The Drivers Utopia FAQ:

    "The Plan is a set of rules designed to enslave proto-pavers into PaveSlavery. After PaveDay, the Pavers remain enslaved by the rules of the Plan, only Pavers who reject the Plan will be free and hence elevated to the lofty heights of Driverhood.

    The Drivers Utopia is a state of complete freedom. The concept of the Paved Earth, Hypercar and Beer/Cheeseburger diets are all metaphors for the state of absolute freedom and convenience that Drivers will exist in.

    To achieve total freedom it is not essential for the Earth to be Paved or to driver hypercars or eat cheeseburgers or drink beer. These are simple metaphors put into the Plan to attract the feebleminded. The stupid Pavers never understand this and will be eternally under the control of the Plan - they will be PaveSlaves. Drivers will do exactly as they please. They will live where they want, go where they want and eat, drink and smoke anything they want. Drivers are free and not tied to the narrow minded dogma of the Plan. Speed, freedom and convenience - anything else is Slavery."

Right. Easy enougth, and add in The List - a collection of undesirables - a breathtaking strictness for getting everything correct, and according to The Plan, and you have a very fun newsgroup/ethos to take part in.

But what does it mean to the real world? Not a lot. The often quoted Plan is not real - although it is a Listable offence to say so to the group, and this leads to all sorts of stupid arguments, flame-wars and other such hilarity. The other thing for the poster to be wary of is the use of the trademark symbol, TM. Nearly everything needs Trademarking, from The PlanTM, The CreedTM, BeerTM, CheeseburgersTM, HyperCarsTM, ad infinitum. The same goes for Capitalising Phrases and Other Important Things seemingly randomly.

Great fun, eh?

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