lagrange, in his wu on
Saint Isidore of Seville, has announced to us the joyful news that this
saint is now
officially the patron saint of
internet users,
programers and, by
logical extension,
noders. I'm certain that the
Vatican hasn't gotten around to formulating
prayers of
petition to St. Isidore appropriate for our needs, so I
offer the
following for your
consideration:
Most
Gracious St. Isidore, who in your
zeal for
knowledge compiled the first
encyclopedia, I beseech you to
protect me from the
random typographical error that may be uncovered by your
representatives here on
earth in the
guise of
editors,
gods and other
assorted specialists. May you, who undoubtedly
cribbed from other
writers in the
compilation of your encyclopedia, protect us from the
wrath of those who would
consign my WU to a
premature demise in
node heaven because of our creative borrowing. Bring our modest
writeup to the attention of the
hierarchy who have
C!s to spare and
incline their
hearts to
generosity and
good will. May they all be inspired to
upvote and may our enemies fail to reach
E2 when we are listed in
New Writeups.
Amen.
Upon Beginning a Writeup
Dear St. Isidore,
ornament of the Church and
indefatigable compiler of all
existing
knowledge, as I
embark upon this
creative effort in
search of the
perfect node,
bless your
lowly servant with your
munificent gifts: an
articulate and
eloquent style to wow those with
points to bestow;
skill and
cunning to
mask my
copy & pastes so that even to the most
zealous guardian will fail to see the truly deviceful
component of my
writeup. Guide my
mouse to
fruitful fields of
facts and
alliteration upon your
web so that even when
data are few my
pyrotechnics may
dazzle, my
skill will
astound and
upvotes shall pour in. Protect my
machine from rolling brownouts and inspire me to make
frequent saves so that not one insight shall be lost to cyberspace. Amen.
St. Isidore, you who
presided over
countless councils and summarized most lengthy proceedings, bless me, your
humble,
meek and
unassuming servant, as I enter the
catbox to
communicate with my intimidating
peers;
bestow upon me a
silver tongue, the gift of the
glib remark, the
insightful comment and electrifying
repartee that all who read may
marvel at my
skill and
wisdom. Save me from the gnashing
jaws of
EDB and may my flavor unto him be as
bitter gall. When he stalks give me the gift to
evade his
grasp with honeyed
words and
innocuous remarks so that his
wrath may pass over me and be as nothing.