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The typewriter kept breaking, no matter how many times I kissed it's owner, Dream Girl

My garden wouldn't stay the same size. The fences were replaced by trees.

The main road was flooded and people used boats to travel to work. I sat on the new river bank and called out to women in their canoes.

The rain destroyed the roof of Sainsbury's and many trees grew there. I bought some food and paid with leaves.

My neighbours complained that they couldn't drive to work; they had huge trucks and 4x4s that were useless because of the river.

I swam to work, the water was cool, but I got covered in pond weed

We find the third bear dead and there's no way to get past it on this slope without stepping on part of his already-disintegrating body. Probably it's one of us who killed him, but no one admits to it. I think it's tragic: he was rough but meant well, after all.

When we pass by later (we're walking in circles, we realize), there's nothing but coarse, greasy, smelly fur; most of the flesh has sunk into the ground. An incongruous monument has been erected by whomever it is that does those things, with bits of the bloody heads of two pigs doing strange things to each other - but it's all in high-gloss ceramic, so it's ok.

We have to keep moving but the scrub is pretty thick, and the exposed ground is all scrabble.

The lake water is filthy and i don't trust it, but i have to get the boat, which is floating off and full of water. It's made of aluminum foil and shards of stiff thin plastic, shaped like an extraordinarily long canoe. I don't want to think about what i'm wading in, and what might be on the bottom by my feet, under the greasy grey water. My sister is chatting with a young man who's either a boy scout of a high-ranking military man. She's turning in the sun to get a better tan, so he moves as if on a track to stay in front of her.

There's a scum on top of the water, at about chest-level now, and it's hard to walk. I hope i don't slip and go under. I try giving the boat a push, but the mass of the water in it makes my push only slightly effective. But then the inertia starts taking it, as the water sloshes back and forth, and the boat gathers momentum in pulses. My sister shouts that the boat is going to run into an ugly rock garden nearby, and i manage to redirect it into the weeds. Suddenly my sister is dragging me through the water (by my hair?) and i end up in the weeds myself. The air bladders on the weeds are shaped like babies, i see: sickly waxy green babies, covered with algae, frog spawn, grease slicks, and six-pack holders. I am totally entangled.

Whoa, dizzy! Boats and pondweed. Get outta my head! It's not a nice place to be!

- / +

  • My parents and I walked to Canada to buy lottery tickets. I wanted Chinese food but Dad said no.
  • brushing my teeth with shampoo, red like blood welling up out of the tube
  • In the theater this woman was reading and talking and totally not paying attention to the movie; why was she there? I asked her if she's please turn off the overhead lights and she said NO. "Can't you see that this is more important?" waving her copy of an Anne Rice novel.
  • oreo crumbs for lunch
  • I was so afraid of him. In the cafe I looked at my receipt and it said DIVORCE DIVORCE DIVORCE all the way to the bottom. I asked the coffeeseller to walk me to my car. She opened the door to the parking lot and there he was. I slunk back against the wall inside, hoping it was too dark for him to have seen me. She called flippantly to him, distracting him. On one level it hurt me to hear him flirting so easily with a stranger, but mostly I was watching her beautiful heavy hair.
I had died. I didn't remember how, just that it wasn't particularly tragic, just an accident, and that I was dead. I don't know how I knew I was dead, nobody told me, and there were no flashing neon signs that said "You're dead!". I was standing on a road, cobblestones, that stretched off into eternity. Aside from the road there was nothing, not just blackness, but nothing, just an eternal sense of depth and pervasiveness. I was not sad about my death, all I felt was a sense of wonder at this strange place I had been taken to. On the road were others who were also dead, they were all walking, onwards into infinity.

As I continued down the road, I noticed people standing there who were not walking. They were people I had known in my life, those who I'd known and those who I'd loved. The stood there waiting for me to pass them by, in their dreams to say goodbye.

As I passed my friends I stopped and spoke to each one, hugging them as I knew it would be last time I would see them ever again. I took my time, because there was no rush. I had all of eternity.

As I continued to walk further and further down the road, those that I knew grew fewer and fewer, reduced to the few that I had truly loved. Finally I reached my family, who were waiting for me at the foot of a bridge, that stretched off into nothingness.

The stood there, smiling, joyeous to see me one last time. I gave them each a hug and a kiss, throwing my arms around them to tell them how much I cared for them and loved them. They smiled, and my mother and father told me they were proud of the life I had lived. I began to cry, for the first time regreting leaving life behind me.

All too soon it was time to go, my family was about to wake, and I had to continue on my eternal journey. I stood there on the road, until they had faded into mist, into memory, and I walked onto the bridge and into nothing.
i was visiting my friend kiro at nyc.
after we went for coffee, we headed off to his apartment in harlem.
when kiro opened the door of his room, i couldn't believe the sight i've seen.
his room was furnished in very tipical/traditional japanese apartment's room way.
floor was covered by tatamis. rooms were separeated by shoujis...
i even sensed the smell of katorisenkou.
i said 'what's going on?' to kiro, and he seemed to be confused by being asked this question.
another surprise.
when i entered the living room, there was kunio sitting by the window. we went same kindergarten together, but i've never herad of him since then.
i said hi to him and he gave me a glance and walked way to somewhere.
i was totally confused at that time.
kiro said he gonna give his girlfriend call to tell her to come over.
after a while
his grilfriend rung a bell and opened the door.
i was really shocked by seeing her because his grilfriend was my grandma...
Eschaton Immanent

  • It is the last day before the end of time, December 21, 2012. The immanence of the Eschaton is apparently an accepted fact because the world and everyone in it have gone fucking crazy. While I am pondering the metaphysics of what it will feel like to become one with space and time in infinite concrescence, there are riots in the streets and one-person armies running all over the place. My girlfriend and I are on the run too, hiding in the water under a dock. Explosions sound every couple of minutes. There is absolute chaos--actualized anarchy. I think to myself, "if the end is supposed to be the unification of all matter and intelligence in the universe, then why am I feeling more alone on planet Earth than I have ever felt before?"

    Dream ends before the universe does. Guess I'll have to wait until the real thing, huh?

See also:
I Know When The World Will End
Omega Point
December 21, 2012

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