Right to arm bears (idea) by ralph noder

it is no secret that for the last 3 decades, we have been amassing a force of killer bears in the upstate region of new york known as the catskills. they are being trained in the firing of small arms as well as slingshots and riflery.

we feel it is our constitutional right to form this group and we shall not be stopped until all the bears are free.

unconditional release of all zoo bears into the cities that these zoos are located
hotel/motel and restaurant accomodations for said bears
a bear appreciation month, in the summertime, so as not to interfere with hibernation times
a central location where the bears can get their guns cleaned and stock up on ammo (perhaps a wal-mart in the valdosta, GA area)
a constitutional amendment granting all bears full right previously granted to humans

if the above conditions are not met in full, we shall unleash these armed bears on first grade classes worldwide.

This product was tested on cute, furry animals with big, sad eyes	Smokey the Bear Sutra	Exit, pursued by a bear	right to bear arms
Right to keep armed bears	Virgin Utah Town ordinance No. 2000-06-15	If I had a monkey, I'd give it a gun	Completely unexplainable random behavior
How many angels can dance on the head of a pin?	The Arm Thing	Where are those polar bears getting all that Coca-Cola?	His Dark Materials
right to keep and bear arms	Goodbye, legs	Catskills	The Tale of Popolo: Part 1
ammunition naming conventions	10 Things I Learned Whilst Dressed As A Bear	Waltzing with Bears	The Bear FAQ
Guns don't kill people. Wait, guns do kill people.	Bears all his sons away;