I will not notice him today. He is the same as everybody else. I am
not a 13-year-old
school girl. I've gotten off of a
relationship before without making a
fool of myself, I just don't notice him any more than anybody else. I don't put my hand close in case he wants to take it. I didn't buy this
dress for him. I didn’t clean my room and
vacuum just in case he might want to stop by. Damn I hate how this stuff turns me into a
little girl again. I did not buy this dress.
I did not buy this dress! I don’t notice anything. I don't notice anything, I do not expect anything, I will probably be excluded from group activities so they can invite my
ex-boyfriend for once anyway. I will sit home all day tomorrow and study
quantum mechanics and paint and bake something for desert for the
dinner, I will not see him, I will not talk to him unless spoken to and he will not speak to me and this just leaves me in that stupid place of
waiting again. Waiting and waiting when I know exactly what's going on. I did not buy this dress. I can
talk myself down. I can talk myself down. I am
down.
I did not buy this
dress.
I know exactly what's going to happen, which is we're going to be really good friends and have a great time and
nothing more and
nothing less and then he will
leave.
Why am I so useless in waiting!?!?!?!?!
Talk myself down. Talk myself down. I am
down.