There is only one correct
way to open a banana
. It comes naturally to all intelligent
beeings to open it in the end opposite
of where the stalk
is. The stalk should more properly be reffered to as the handle
of the banana, since this is where you hold
it, when doing it properly.
Sadly, however, the world is full of people who open it in the wrong end, thereby harming themselves, lessening their banana-eating experience, and raping the banana.
Here are some of the most important reasons why you should open the banana in the right end, if you need convincing. This list is not for those of us who know that this is the way to open a banana. It is for those poor individuals who have been taught otherwise as ignorant children, or are just too stupid to realize it.
So without further ado, here are the reasons:
- The banana is symmetrical while you're eating it.
- When you're almost done with it, you still have something to hold onto.
- The peel looks more aesthetic after you're done.
- The banana flower sat in the end you open. Continuity implies you should open the banana in the same direction the banana flower once opened.
- A banana peel from a correctly opened banana can resemble a fountain, a squid or a palm tree. An incorrectly opened banana peel doesn't resemble anything at all!
- Opening it in the wrong end makes you look incredibly stupid.
: Don't make a fool
of yourself by opening the banana incorrect
ly, at least not while others are watching! You don't want to appear stupid, do you?