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  • When we got back to the house Pete and I sat in the car for a minute listening to the radio, trying not to laugh. It was cold so we ran to the house.

  • An intensifying machine. If you were sure you had a good heart you could volunteer to be processed into something stronger, so you could protect her.

  • Watching myself in the mirror trying to button a shirt that used to fit. We were telling his parents tonight about my pregnancy and I knew he would be no help. Nothing I tried on fit, and I was getting panicky.

    I read my old diary which was blocks of painted wood. Confusing, not even I could follow it. I stared at my sweater sleeve and wondered why I had bought it; there were little beads woven into the fabric; dumb.

    I asked the jury about my baby and they threw the biggest pearl into the river. I thought it was old-fashioned but was patient with them. Their answer was confusing and contradictory, because the pearl had floated then sunk. They gave me a green ring which I put on. My father was screaming about "don't put it on like THAT!" but I didn't know what he meant. It was beautiful and almost matched my nail polish, which I took as a sign. But it didn't fit, and I took that as a sign too.

  • This time when I went back in time to my wedding day, I decided to go to the church after all. Usually I just didn't show. It was horrible to see all the people I'd disappointed. I ran through a crowd of whispers and stares - none of them knew me very well, but they knew I was supposed to be the bride, and they knew I was in jeans. I made James come with me and ran out. I don't remember what I said to him but it was very common-sensical and convinced him he'd be better off doing non-love things for a while. I offered my dad - I knew he'd love to go fishing. We raced down the snowy sidewalk to the river and I got tangled in hanging branches, so James won. When we got there he went down to check out the river and I stayed on the bank scooping up spare change. A man pulled up and kept rolling his car up and back. He may have been Kiefer Sutherland but I don't really know who that is. He was creeping me out so I told him to go the hell away. He laughed. I threw dirt on his car and ran.

  • At the apartment complex there were shallow canals instead of roads. Dusik rode her motorcycle through them, sending up giant waves. The kids shrieked and ran after her. Flo was confused.

    A tall gorgeous girl walked past, talking to her sister. "No, you put it in the cabinet by the stove. Remember? When Mama was making another baby?" I asked her what she meant and she said her mother had just finished making another one, three in a row. I knew she didn't mean triplets and I knew it hadn't taken nine months per baby - I had the sense that this woman could make a baby in a few days. "At least one of em's meant for the dumpster."

  • Sadie being a dumbass again

  • At Pete's house but I don't know where he was. When I woke up Debbie was there, and offered me legos. I accepted. I apologized for falling asleep every time I came over. Her dog liked the blue pillow I had brought. We talked about Pete, but I don't know what we said.