I wasn't exactly sure of where we were going, but the prospect of adventure brightened my otherwise murky thoughts. Her footsteps sounded like brisk slaps in the face as I blindly followed her down a hallway lit only by flickering light from smoke bellowing candles. I was just about to accuse her of speaking monstrous lies when we passed under a sign reading This way to Paradise. Pushing open the door, my eyes widened at the virtual cadre of candy and, of course, illegal firearms. Karen was always so well prepared. I smiled at her knowingly and reached for a caramel covered apple to cure my fatigue, but she knocked it out of my hand before I could take a bite. Apparently they are not safe to eat. I would only find out later that all the candy in the room had been poisoned as a way of finishing the job if the weapons should fail. Bypassing this treasure trove of goodness, Karen leads me to the back room where they were all waiting- Elmer, Floyd, and Warren. I know this sounds absurd, and I apologize for that, but it seems that truth is always stranger than fantasy. Crossing the room, I express my shock at seeing everyone together for the first time in years. It's almost as if nothing had changed. "Natch" is the only word that Elmer can think of to describe the situation. The room falls silent as I launch into a tirade denouncing the stupidity of that word. He always used that word and I hate him more than anything! I grab Elmer by the collar of his saliva encrusted shirt and I would easily have thrown him out the window if there had been one. Still swaying halfway between anger and placidity, I settle for spitting in his face and pushing him to the floor. I was about to hit him one last time for good measure when the loud thump of the metal door stopped me dead in my tracks. It was him- the current leader of our seedy operation. Beads of sweat ran down my neck as the lights came up to fully reveal the danger of our situation. We were in for a long night.