When I returned to E2 after the long weekend, I founbd a /msg from a noder telling me my writeup for
Satanism made "no sense". Joy. Naturally I
fretted about it the rest of the day, because my
Christian nodes are the ones that mean the most to me, are the hardest to write, and are the most likely to provoke
criticism. If I can do the topic
justice then I'm not worried about the criticism, but if they make no sense, then I might as well have stayed home.
So I composed a reply and was about to node it, but then stopped to consider whether I wanted to kick off another Quiz-vs.-MoJoe type debate. Just imagining it made me feel bored and tired, so I got his email address and sent it this morning. Pity, though - I could use the node count.
I've been unaccountably anxious about work ever since I got back. It feels like The Dread is stirring in me again, and I don't know why. I actually resorted to taking St. John's Wort yesterday and today; with my luck it'll have the effect of making me unfocused, unmotivated, and forgetful and then I'll have some real worries. I've also not felt very creative, which bugs me since writing has become fun again and I want to keep it up. I wish I could post a sign in my cubicle reading "DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE? THEN WRITE."
When we were in Vegas this weekend (sorry Ed, we really did want to hook up with you and C. but it turned into a whole family thing with much enforced togetherness) we ran into Geoff who asked me "Who are you writing for now?" I loved that he asked me that, and I wish the answer had been someone, anyone.