I don't know why it's such a big mystery
. It's really quite simple
if you look at the problem outside the perspective
of an equation
. It really doesn't take a rocket surgeon
to figure it out.
This is one intellectual bar bet that I'll win, too. Feed me shards of broken glass, make me drink poop juice, sell my sister's soul to the black heart of rock 'n' roll -- I'll never talk. It is this knowledge that makes me superior to all creatures, except, possibly, most felines. That's right. Fuzzy little kitties knew the answer all along, you fools! Precious furry kittens knew, and that's why they grow up to be so damned smug!
Get me drunk, sex me up, wine me and dine me, shower me with riches. Yeah, try and weasel it out of me, you grovelling bastards. You won't get anything, not even a hint as to its shape. My knowledge can bring the universe crumbling into an impossibly simple singularity. It is with this power that I will make every pinko, commie, hussie, geek, jerk, loser, man, woman, & child on this planet realize that I am the final arbiter of truth in this, and any other, existence.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go make a sandwich. A BIG EGO SANDWICH, 'cause that's what I deserve, you big zero.