If ya wanna take this matchup seriously (and if you're a fanboy... well, we always take these matchups seriously), you may start out thinking that Plas has this game wrapped up. Reed Richards stretches himself all over the place, but he just stretches. Plastic Man gets all fancy, stretching and shape-shifting himself into all kinds of funny shapes. I've seen him turn himself into a motorcycle, a pogo stick, a frog, a signpost, a balloon, a donkey, a giant hammer, the Grim Reaper, an Armani dress, and even Batman and the Joker! Plastic Man uses his powers much more creatively than Mr. Fantastic does, so one could be excused from expecting Plas to take the fight easily.

However, Mr. Fantastic has a very important advantage that Plastic Man cannot top: Reed Richards is a goddamn genius. Plastic Man can twist himself into any shape he wants, but Mr. Fantastic can build an Ultimate Nullifier with a stick of gum, a paper clip, and a broken TRS-80 monitor. Does Plas have a chance in hell against that kind of intellect? Game, set, and match: Mr. Fantastic.

And while Plastic Man is indeed a damn silly pimp, Mr. Fantastic has an elastic dick and still can't keep his woman from chasing after a guy with pointy ears and wings on his ankles. That's just so feeble.

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