In Daniel Pinkwater
's The Snarkout Boys and the Baconburg Horror
, in which the city of Baconburg
seems to be infested by a werewolf
, Coping With Werewolves
by K.E. Kelman, PH (that's phantom
ologist) is what people consult. Unfortunately, Kelman likes werewolves, thinks they are misunderstood, and advises people to think of them as "a big friendly dog
which is also a human being
at times, and potentially very dangerous."
The book claims that Ludwig van Beethoven, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Queen Victoria, Thomas Jefferson, Sigmund Freud, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, Martin Luther, and Walter Cronkite were or are werewolves. The book apparently ends with:
The author hopes that the reader of this little book will try to show some understanding the next time he meets a werewolf -- and even in the unlikely event that there should be a bit of tooth-play, to remember that this is just the werewolf's way of saying, "I like you." So, dear reader, the next time something big and furry and horrible gets you by the leg, just remember the old lycanthropic greeting, "Grrrrrrrrrowf!" You may be at the beginning of a beautiful friendship.