Hello and thanks for reading "blow me". As you know if you tuned in last week, this is a game show with only one participant: you.

Applause

There, you see, the crowd loves you already! Okay, let's get the show on the road! You get to test yourself with a short quiz.

Applause

You will be asked 4 questions. For each question you must read the node in question and choose the answer that best reflects your views. You will get a complete and professional psychological appraisal of yourself at the end of the quiz. (The psychological appraisal is based on your score, and was designed by our very own award-winning psychiatrist, Connie Lingus).

Question 1: Why do men like women's breasts?

  1. I fully agree with alex.tan - it is for sexual selection.
  2. I fully agree with Pseudo-Intellectual - we like big boobs because they remind the chimp part of our brain of a big swollen bum.
  3. I fully agree with Gritchka - Quite a lot of women are completely flat-chested.
  4. I fully agree with stud9920 - Maybe female aliens have them.
  5. I fully agree with Hermetic - I am not a pervert!
  6. blow me
Question 2: Which God was cooler, the one from the Old Testament or the one from the New Testament?
  1. I fully agree with Lockheart - the Old Testament God was much cooler.
  2. I fully agree with Rook - Yaldabaoth must, by definition, be less cool.
  3. I fully agree with ahab - Bush appears to not think before he speaks.
  4. I fully agree with Geez - Gangsta-rappers are cool.
  5. I fully agree with blaaf - Geez, I hope you are joking.
  6. blow me
Question 3: Why is it rude to open a door for a woman?
  1. I fully agree with Old Nick - It's never rude to open a door for anyone.
  2. I fully agree with juliet - I understand the idea of chivalry, but don't waste my time.
  3. I fully agree with elwoodblues - I can see how that would be offensive, I really can.
  4. I fully agree with TxdoHawk - I'm lucky I can still walk.
  5. blow me
Question 4: Do fat men get fat dicks?
  1. I fully agree with DJuxtaposition - men's penises, or penii, as it were, do not gain length or breadth with a flux of their weight.
  2. I fully agree with alex.tan - there is very little fat in the penis shaft itself.
  3. I fully agree with z_evil1 - I can plainly feel every ripple of the engorged corpus cavernosum beneath a thin layer of skin.
  4. I fully agree with fnordian - the plural of penis is penises or penes, not penii.
  5. I fully agree with pinky64 - My aunt is a medical doctor.
  6. blow me.
** All quotes are actual quotes from the writeups themselves.

Add up your score, and check with the chart below:


score |  psychological appraisal
------------------------------------------------------------------
      |
1-5   | You have deeply developed morals. 
      |
6-11  | You have a strong inner sense of what is right and wrong
      | but you are not yet strong enough to follow your heart.
      |
12-16 | Haha! You are a cretin!
      |
17-22 | Still a cretin.
      |
23    | You guessed it - blow me.
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