doubleb747: I, too, can't just throw in a pithy "don't do it!". I think I can tell you there might be an answer where you think there is none.

Maybe you're just not satisfied with the way your life is turning out so far. Sure, on the surface, things look great -- free ride in college, a girlfriend, good friends and family, etc. But are you actually happy with it all?

Having everything the world thinks you should have doesn't mean squat if it's not what you want. I imagine you feel guilty for not being happier because others around you constantly remind you of how awesome your life is, but you just don't feel it. You shouldn't feel guilty just because you long for more.

My pithy suggestion is to seek out that little missing piece. Maybe your life is okay, but some element is absent or lacking. Maybe your life is all wrong and you need to head in a new direction entirely. I dunno. Worst thing you can do is nothing. Methinks it's a bad idea to let suicidal thoughts go unchallenged.

I'm officially sick of being ill. The various colors of the goo coming out of my nose are quite irritating and I'm eager for it to stop.

Our new house is coming along nicely; changes since we last visited on Sunday, July 27, 2003 included working power in several areas (the kitchen, hallways, and closets, but all still connected to the construction crew's circuits and not the house's own electric meter and circuit box), and a massive cleanup that removed everything but a bit of dust from the floors all throughout the house. Guess they're ready for the carpeting now.

Sick as I am of this cold, I'm even more tired of waiting for the house to be finished. Nobody's dragging their feet or delaying stuff or anything; I'm just getting impatient. Every day since we first learned the mortgage was approved, we've both been feeling this apartment's walls closing in on us.

It doesn't help that our new upstairs neighbors seem to spend all their time stomping as loudly as possible almost exclusively during the hours we sleep.