PhD in a Haiku (thing)

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What do you want, a cookie?	Haiku	Is Jeeves gay?	PhD
How to get a Ph.D.	a spring haiku for the pessimist	overheard at coffeeshop haiku	postdoc
Loneliness haiku	post-doc	stuck in relationship haiku	haiku for a lover
Haiku e-mail	Lack of Coffee Haiku	Graduate school	The Blood Bargain
College Haiku	frustrated haiku	End of a relationship haiku	sleep
Death Haiku	John Wheeler	Anuket	I tried to arrange my life in paragraphs, unaware that I was a haiku