Bugs are so inconsiderate. You're sitting on the throne, doing your business, and low and behold across the floor crawls the biggest spider you've seen - in at least a few days anyway. You don't want to break your comfort, so getting up is out of the question. But the insect is imminent and heading towards your feet - it must be stopped! You begin scanning the landscape for a weapon of choice. "Hmm, Lysol - kills viruses, bacteria, mold and mildew. I'll bet it'll work on spiders too." Quickly, you reach for the can of Lysol, and blast the hideous arachne with a solution of Alkyl Dimethyl Benzyl Ammonium Saccharinate, Ethanol and 20.9% inert ingredients. It works! The spider has been defeated! Upon closer examination of the can, you read the notice "It is a violation of federal law to use this product in a manner inconsistent with its labeling." If anybody asks: You were disinfecting the spider.

I've also found hairspray works quite well as insecticide in a pinch.