Were you really expecting to only learn true things when you signed up for this class? (person)
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Tue Jul 25 2000 at 5:24:29
I mean, fuck.
He says Please keep the cursing to a minimum in my motherfucking classroom. The class laughs. With anyone else I would think less of them for using
the easy joke
, but he knows it's easy, that's why he did it. He knows the right strings, and he pulls. Sometimes I think he is a good man and is only searching for people who can't be
so easily manipulated
. That is what I am trying to be anyway. I don't know if it's what he really wants from me but it's all I can do.
But not right now.
The important thing now is
to get out of his spotlight. Say something moderately insightful that might occupy him for a moment, distract him in any direction other than me. As it is, he's perched on the desk in front of mine, sitting backwards and higher than me, frowning down, waiting. There was a guy sitting there, but he made him get up. The guy did not complain or refuse. I like to think/pretend I would have.
Years of being pretty sure I failed
whatever his undefined test was. But
I cannot get away from Lolita
. I am reading this other novel and the author is doing all sorts of sneaky things with words, shuffling the letters around like a trick deck. Maybe you know it's rigged but you do not know what he is going to do with it. And then I am reading this other book and
I cannot get away from Faulkner
. Please don't think I'm well-read. I hardly know Faulkner. I only read that one awful book. And now it has come back to show me new things in what I am reading now.
This happens over and over. It did not happen in college and
it did not happen right away
afterwards. It needed gestation I guess.
I start a letter. It has been building for a while and it is ripe and only wants writing down. Dear
I hated you at the time and I will not pretend I am entirely past that. You never stopped demanding, you made everything so hard. Now,
I cannot get away from you
and maybe that is not what you were after but I would like to thank you anyway.
Here are the things I have started to learn.
There is more to the letter, but it is not for you.
I like it!
Unwritten rules for driving
Risqué comment opportunities when you're a Subway employee
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From now on, any ordinary knowledge is no longer going to satisfy you, I'm afraid
I don't want to fall so easily
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One learns the most when teaching others
Those who have abandoned their dreams will discourage yours
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The Ballad of Sawney Bean
What we've got here is a failure to communicate
I've lost my memory but I have ink, so.
I feel things, hundredsfold, a papercut requires stitches
Stereotypes have to start somewhere
You can't get there from here
as the evening wound down
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I figured things would be okay once the werewolf started to cry
Flesh rots, metal rusts, stone erodes, digital is forever
It's fall and you know what that means
So I'm wrestling with the demoness while the priest is trying not to soil his vestments, and Faust is just sitting there like an idiot
English words of Welsh origin
Frank Zappa: Statement To Congress September 19, 1985
Choose short titles
Drunken words are sober thoughts
For Jamal Kashoggi
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sleep paralysis nightmare: bedroom intruder reads a newspaper?
May we live until the stars fall.
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