Our last conversation (idea)

So much has been made of this.

In a nutshell, I think: Love everyone, trust no one.

When I get hurt I think of reasons not to love you anymore. Bad habits; hypocrisies; a diary of the times love barely kept me from killing you.

You weren't the only one I lost this way. I gave up loving in the name of preserving my heart.

I stopped changing my clothes in front of her, and I refused to let her see me cry. I wasn't afraid of her anymore, but I had to cover the marks she made in my heart.

We were on speaking terms when he died but I'd begun to hear his voice like I hear bad radio, i.e., only when I have to. It was different before he broke me (and he broke me a number of times). All I heard that was a bad refrain.
Lonely. Wanna die.
Girl, you know the reason why.
Bored me; I said so aloud.
I could have listened to the verses in between and known he meant business, but I couldn't be broken any further.

I think all the time about saving lives, probably to my own psychological peril. I give blood because I've got it on my hands.