Seriously. Just don't do it. Not unless he's trying to rape or murder you (that goes for guys and girls).

Guys, you know what I'm talking about. Girls, here's a little piece of information you probably already knew: It hurts. But it's not that momentary, bothering sting like getting your finger pricked or even getting punched square in the face. No, it's an agonizing, decapitating sort of pain that seems to last for hours and hours and the agony never quite stops. You feel like you'll never be able to do anything with your nether regions again. The pain is absolutely unbearable.

How exactly does it feel? Think of it this way. Everybody knows how it feels to get cut. At the very beginning, it really hurts, but after a couple of seconds, the pain fades. Being kicked in the crotch feels like getting cut at first: but for hours on end. That combined with a dull aching throb all around one's stomach that lasts even longer than the pain from the initial blow, and that's just about how much it hurts, with an iron poker added to the nads and surrounding areas for good measure.

Of course, girls do experience a similar pain, as probably a few girls would point out. Childbirth. It lasts longer than getting kicked in the crotch, I'll give you that, but in order to get to a similar pain threshhold than getting kneed in the nads(it's been proven with research =P) one would have to take some boiling acid and shove it into the uterus - while giving birth - or so I'm told. But don't believe me. I got that from a psychedelic source.

In short, kicking a guy in the crotch should be considered tantamount to sexual assault. Wait. Oops. Hehe..... It is sexual assault. What I mean to say that it's just wrong! That's a place that's only meant for very good things. Don't treat it like a punching bag! < hr / > < small > This public service announcement brought to you by Captain Crunch. < /small >