So... the system, when used, self-destructs?

This sounds like something that will eventually work its way into Nethack, and probably sooner rather than later.

    "You have found a tin (m)."

(r)ead (m)

    "The tin reads 'One (1) tin of whoop-ass.'"

(/)(n)Tin of whoop-ass (This is the "what-is" command.)

    "It does exactly what it says on the tin."

(#-a)pply (m)

    "This is a tin of whoop-ass! (more)"
    "In which direction would you like to apply?"


    "You open up a tin of whoop-ass on the orc! (more)"
    "You slay the orc!"

This would probably exercise charisma. Who's the man? Who's the man??

(This has been yet another hopeless Nethack injoke, and one that probably should never have escaped from its newsgroup.)