Today I had my first real contact with commercial gambling.
It was in a charming little room, just off from the side of a bar in Wellington, and they'd managed to pack a dozen or more of the worryingly popular pokies in there.
"My god", I chirped happily with an unweildy box of juice in my hand, "this place reeks of cigarette smoke and despair!"
We were there long enough to lose the grand-total of $14 we had on us (sure we won some of that back, but we went ahead and gambled that away too) and so come to the decision that we don't know how to gamble.
Broken and without any juice to cry into (I'd downed the remainder some time ago) we waited outside Cafe Istanbul as another (non-gambling) friend popped in to see his girlfriend who works there.
Several National Party MP's (and some from other political parties apparently) were dining there this night, among them our reigning Prime Minister - Helen Clarke.
Being that we were outside for a good thirty seconds I got bored, so killed some time by suggesting to my partner in legalised gambling that he wait for our nations leader to come outside and seduce her.
He became very emotional at this suggestion, moreso when I suggested he walk up to her and use the line "Excuse me, I was wondering if perhaps you know my horse, Bronco?"
I was detailing him being whisked off to expensive hotels as Helen had her awful way with him (he was threatening to throw me in front of the next moving car) when the last of our trio emerged and saved me from serious physical harm.