Problems with this list:
  • My cat jumps on me, my keyboard, the book I'm reading, or whatever I'm looking at at the time because he has to always be the center of attention.
  • My cat poops outside and then catches mice/birds/squirrels and takes them inside, dead or alive.
  • Cats sing and dance on the fence every night even if the neighbors throw shoes at them.
  • I like dog breath.
  • Cats don't act glad to see you.
  • Scenario: You've got too much shit. How are you going to get rid of it?
  • My cat lies in the middle of my bed, on all the covers so I can't use them and I have to sleep on the very edge.


Bob (I refuse to use the C Word): I'm too nice to move the cat from the bed, even if he doesn't mind.