I had another interview today, this time with Raytheon. That's right, the guided missile/baby killing corporation. It was just another "What are your goals, What are your strengths, etc." bunch of bullshit questions that they ask just make sure that you aren't a moron and can present yourself as a somewhat competent human being. But, word is that they need to hire an assload of engineers, so I'm thinking that this might be better than the Teradyne ones.

I also did some more prep work for my premier at this weekend's steeplechase. Mainly practicing water jumps and the like, after our workout that beat every ounce of speed out of my quads. I'm going to try to qualify for the ECAC championships, which requires a 9:52. The reason is that this is latest race I can reasonably qualify for, May 15. And that is when my parents are coming out, for my graduation.

I haven't talked to my mom for a couple days, she just started chemo last weekend. Apparently there is nothing better than shooting a person full of poison and cutting off parts of them to cure cancer. Her mastectomy is probably going to be either at the end of April or early May. Hopefully, she'll be fine enough for the trip out.

Needless to say, this is the reason I want to qualify for ECAC's: So my mom can see me run. She hasn't seen me race since high school. Is this incredibly self-centered, or a good thing? I donated $20 to my friend Hilary's Dana Farber Boston Marathon fund raising effort in the same spirit.

So, this need to qualify to please my parents (as well as find a job, I suppose) is driving most of my actions. Every time I start to feel the wind throw me around on the track, I think about how much time I need to drop on every lap in order to get that time. My legs turn faster, and it hurts, but it's motivated. Every time I'm lifting and the end of the set just won't come, I'm thinking of her when I crank out the last few reps. When I'm heading into the job interview, I think of mom, who won't be able to afford to pay my rent anymore, so I need this job.

Maybe it's bad, true. But I'm motivated. Stay strong Claudia. I will too.