1. If is says Compaq, pray like hell you will never have to take it apart.

2. If it says Microsoft, don't ask why it's broken. The answer is in the question.

3. If it says Jolt, don't let them take it away from you.

4. If it says Linux, your boss doesn't want to hear about it. No matter how cool it is.

and lastly,

5. If it says something vague about no-user-service something with parts but the words don't really make sense to you, take it apart and fuck with it until it makes sense.

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