Title: Speedball 2100
Developer: Empire Interactive
Publisher: Take 2 Interactive
Date Published: October 24, 2000
Platforms: PSOne
ESRB Rating: Everyone

The backstory (just to get it out of the way): Super corporations own everybody, no crime, no wars and so forth, and Speedball is the only sport. In other words, pure fluff.

Once again, you play as Brutal Deluxe, and also once again, Brutal Deluxe sucks, and is at the bottom. Thus, the meat of the game goes like this: play Speedball, raise statistics. Repeat.

For those not in the know, a game of Speedball goes like this: The game is three minutes long, divided into two halves of 90 seconds each. There are nine people per team, with labels such as "right midlfield", "center forward" and so forth. However, except for the goalie, all of then serve pretty much the same purpose. The purpose? Get the heavy metal ball into the enemy's goal, past their goalie.

After the game is over, the team with the most points wins. Methods of scoring are:

  • Put the ball in the goal: 10 points. Simple.
  • Hit a star on the opposing side of the arena: 2 points. On one wall of the arena, there are 5 stars lined up in a row. Hit one to score 2 points, hit all 5 for an extra 10 points, for a total of 20.
  • Hit the score sphere in front of the goal: 2 points. The score sphere is between the center of the field and the opposing goal. Hit it, 2 points, no questions asked.
  • Injure an opposing player: 10 points. Most sports discourage injury. Speedball, well, injury is a good thing. Just repeatedly tackle the same guy over and over, and evenually he'll get really hurt. And they'll also be out a player for quite a few games, too!
  • Not exactly a direct scoring method, but on the sides of the field, opposite the center, there are two loops. Throw the ball in the loop, and if it goes around, you get a multiplier for all other goals: first 1.5X, then on each loop, 2X, 2.5X, 3X, 4.5X, and 5X.

After each game, you get some money. I'm not entirely too sure how the money is distributed, as sometimes I get more money when I lose than when I win. Take this money to the gym, where you can't train your people. Instead, in the gym, you can buy new equipment like power gauntlets, shoulder pads, brain modifiers, and so forth. Then your team is better.

Let's put it this way: the music blows. Fortunately, it's almost never around. The sound is alright, and after each goal, someone shouts for ice cream or corndogs. And finally, the graphics are respectable, but by no means good (as it's PSOne).

This game is a great way for two people to pass the time. It's also really easy to find. Most stores have it now for US$10. I happened to get mine out of an arcade machine for the $3 spin it took to get it. Worth my money.

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