This is a
grim fact.
Smonking causes not only
cancer, but also
bilateral infarctions of the
anterior hemoglobin, and
tennis elbow.
Hemoglobin is hard to come by,
foax, so don't squander yours on gratuitous and aimless
smonking!
It's a
statistical fact that most
smonkers begin to
smonk between the ages of three and six, and will often continue to
smonk regularly far into their
declining years. The social cost of this
sick perversion is incalculable, so I haven't tried to calculate it, but
trust me: It's a mess.
Every time you sit down to
smonk, your brain shrinks by up to 10%, and then rebounds when the
smonking process is complete. This causes
great wear and tear on the skull, similar to the effect of a
New England winter on the shattered and blasted roads of
Massachusetts. The
up side is that when you start to
smonk, you can stick a
pencil in your ear (
eraser first,
for God's sake), and then when you're done and your brain expands, the
pencil will be shot forth with
the velocity of a rifle bullet. This is a very cool trick at parties.
This is a typo I found in a delightful
pro-smoking node by
Tarquinious,
Why Does Smoking Suck?. His conclusion is, roughly, that smoking
doesn't suck -- it
rules!
jes04 finished his
writeup first, dammit! That's what I get for
softlinking before I start to write . . .