only exists in the mind of its citizens. There are no political borders
, except the ones that we're willing to recognise. That's why the inhabitants of a tiny corner of a tiny island
hanging off the edge of Europe
has drawn a whole new world map. Inside the little corner of the island it says :
All de Cork fellas, like
And daubed over the rest of the world it says:
De rest ah dem langers
Inside Ireland, Cork is known as the Rebel County. The rest of the country just plain don't like us. Why? I dunno, like. We adopted Red as the colour of our revolution when Marx was in nappies. We bred the most loyal warriors of the revolution before the formation of the Irish free state. We were deeply pissed when Dublin became its capital, and have fought a cultural war ever since.
Who knows. I just know that there's a tiny town in the south of Ireland, and it stands cupped between a handful of hills, and on a summer day it glistens like a tear, and it's people speak in a magical voice where meaning is sacrificied for rhythm, structure for music. They sing to each other. And I love it with all my heart.
The People's Republic Of Cork was declared in 1997, by some drunk guys who had a few too many Beamishes with their sandwich down the long valley. It espouses strong free-marketist principles ("every langer for himself, like"), yet is unafraid to assert itself militarily ("get away from me now or I'll bate the head off ye"). It is as of yet unrecognised by the UN, but it does have a really cool line of t-shirts, which can be seen every where from Graunabraher to Guantanomo Bay, from Bandon to Beijing, from Mitchelstown to Macedonia, from Kanturk to Kuala Lumpur. The t-shirts bear universally recognised symbol of struggle, a white star on a red background, as worn by everyone from Mao Tse-Tung to Roy Keane.
State communications are carried out at the website, based at :
which contains a message board, local articles, and a dictionary translating the local vernacular
("for all de foreign feens dat don't get de gam, like").
To the outside observer, it may appear like an Irish version of The Onion. For example, the articles about how the center of the city is shut down, not for a new public transport system, but the installation of first-world standard sanitation, may seem to be a bit exaggerated. Sadly, it's actually all completely true. The site actually gives a strong and accurate representation of life in The People's Republic.
Whatever you be, Corkman, Kerryman, Iraqi, Martian, discorporate interdimensional entity, or Dubliner, you should keep an eye on the People's Republic website. And sure remember, whereever you're from, you're wan of our own.
BTW - People's Republic of Cork t-shirts are available on the website. They are the single coolest item of clothing in the whole universe. Buy one now!