Do it... do it now! If someone on the street asks you to complete a multiple-choice survey
, mark (a) for every answer. Fill out credit card applications that come in the mail with totally bogus information. Register new accounts at online vendors and web-based email services, writing in phony names, and giving them the email address of someone you hate. Go to sparkmatch.com
and fill in the answers that that lying bastard/bitch of an ex-boy
of yours would answer. Don't hang up on telemarketers and telephone survey people... they're just trying to do their jobs, and make a few bucks to feed themselves. Instead, give them ten minutes
of your time (you would've just wasted it anyway) so they'll get their money, and lie to them so that the stupid fucks at some company's Marketing Division
will get faulty data
I got a free t-shirt earlier today for filling out fake information on a Verizon phone service application. You can reap the rewards too! And if the people doling out the surveys aren't offering prizes to people for filling them out (although they will most of the time if you walk around the corporate red district that is most college campuses), you'll get practice in useful skills such as creative writing, random number generation, and of course, lying. This is the ultimate solution for those of us who are tired of leading a boring, meaningless existence, but can't bring ourselves to engage in the socially accepted cop-outs, such as ending it all, spending weeks at a time drunk/stoned, or staring at a TV all day.