(A spotlight picks up TAYLOR, JORDAN and SAWYER as they walk into the Kopi Bar. The BARISTA is cleaning glasses.)

BARISTA: Oh God, is it Friday already?

TAYLOR: Well, if it isn’t our favorite barista. How’re you doing?

BARISTA: I've been better.

TAYLOR: Oh, what’s wrong?

BARISTA: You guys just walked in.

JORDAN: Alright, I know I’ve asked you this before, but what’s the difference between a red eye and a black eye?

BARISTA: A red eye is one shot of espresso in a normal coffee. Black eyes are two.

JORDAN: Then I’ll get the black eye. I want seven.

BARISTA: I don't think I can do that. Ethically. I’m pretty sure that would count as assisted suicide.

JORDAN: I want ten.

TAYLOR: As a quick aside. You know there’s no law against assisted suicide in this state?

BARISTA: I'll give you one.

TAYLOR: Continuing their train of thought. Just like cannibalism.


SAWYER: Hey, I’ve got a new joke for you.

BARISTA: Can you wait for me to put earplugs in?

SAWYER: Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

BARISTA: (Pause.) I have never had less of a problem telling a customer that I hate them.

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