(or How I was Wickernipple'd Into Submission)

I been Chatterbox'd and Puppet-Sock'd
I been Rancid_Pickle'd, Wickernipple'd
I been EDB'd and XP'd till I'm blind
I been Dannye'd, then I'm branded
Republican, 'cause I'm right-handed
That's the hand I use, well, never mind!

I been Node Heaven'd, resurrected
I been Everything Finger'd and Wharfinger'd
Well, I namespaced all my lyrics, today
And I learned the truth from Uberfetus that
My best writeup ain't no treatise
So I chug Coca-Cola all day.

I knew a man, his brain so small
He couldn't write of nothing at all
He's not the same as you and me
He doesn't dig node-etry, He's so newbie that
When you /msg Deep thought, he thinks you're talking to Douglas Adams,
Whoever he was,
The man ain't got no netiquette,
But its alright, mice,
So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish.

I been Demeter'd, Discofever'd
Jessicapierce won't you please come home?
I been hard link'd, soft link'd, broken node'd
Been Epicenter'd, HTML-scolded
And now someone's packet sniffer'd my phone!

~~A parody of A Simple Desultory Philippic by Simon and Garfunkel.

I offer apologies or gratitude, depending upon your reaction to the inclusion of your user name. Special thanks, in advance, to Sockpuppet for (hopefully) allowing the poetic license of his name in the first line.

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.